Unbelievabley stubborn

[Sleepyk]

our 2.5 year old has turned into the most stubborn little girl and I dont know what to do. If she doesnt want to do something then she will just dig her heels in - I try and be consistant and calm etc but I dont know what to do with her. Unless she wants to she wont eat, brush her teeth or have a shower, she shouts at me or totally ignores me or her latest is she will put herself to bed! This morning, in total she has spent most of the morning either on the stairs crying or in her room crying (she put herself in there). If I put her on the stairs for time out she will literally sit there until I have to let her off as we have things to do! She has fallen asleep sitting there before! She just wont say sorry/give a hug/ stop crying....AAAARRRRGGGGHHH

You have my sympathy. By remaining calm and being consistent you are doing he right thing. What is she doing now? Have you got something planned for this afternoon to wear her out distract her? Maybe a walk or swimming or seeing a friend?

When you've got a min have a look at Liitle Angels and the House of Tiny Tearaways. If you're lucky your local library might have a copy

Sounds like my friend's 3yo DD.

Does she have a favourite toy/game/tv show? Maybe a different punishment either in replacement of the naughty step or in addition for consistent refusal to apologise is in order.

Sleepyk you could be writing about my three year old little boy. He literally woke up one morning and transformed from such a contented, amenable boy into a stubborn mule. To say it was a shock is an understatement. I'm six months on from when this first started and the approach that's worked best for me is to remain calm and consistent as you've mentioned, but also to ignore and appear unfazed by it even if I'm tearing my hair out really. I think for my little boy it's been about him trying to exert control over a situation so I've tried to make sure that I do give him opportunities to make some decisions for himself. I often found that sometimes he would appear to just get up from the wrong side of bed and start a cycle of behavior that would gradually escalate into situations such as you describe. I've gradually got better at recognizing the signs of this and when necessary will give him a warning that there will be a consequence if a behavior continues e.g. The removal of one of his favorite toys which is usually a dinosaur. He can still be really stubborn but I think he always will be as am I sometimes if I'm honest.

Thank you all. I will a read up on things and I have tried the no tv as a threat this morning which had her begrudgingly getting dressed! It justs takes me forever to go anywhere or do anything; meeting friends has become impossible as if we are meeting at a certain time, unless madam is agreeable, we often end up cancelling things because she wont play ball. I actually dread her waking up as I dont know what the day will have in store...awful isnt it? :(

If she won't get ready, how about making it into a race? My DS responds really well to things like " let's see who can get their coat on first"!

If you are dreading each day though, make sure you have something to look forward too, however small, some adult company and some exercise. They will all help you to cope. Reading up does sound like a good idea too, for you and your DH