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Behaviour/development

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I just cannot sit here doing this anymore...

67 replies

BettyBum · 08/01/2013 16:28

Help me, my 18 month old DS is driving me literally insane. I might be depressed but I feel better when I'm not with him so I can't be. He climbs on things. All day. I try to play with him, he is not interested. He goes to play group and has plenty of stimulation and I have lots of friends with children who he plays with several times a week but this climbing is out of control. I know it's probably normal but I actually cannot do it anymore. I have taken all the hard chairs away from the table and locked them away but this makes it hard at meal times as they are heavy and i have a very bad back. I feel so bloody useless with him. He climbs on the raised surface in our lounge which I can't remove and tries to fiddle with our blinds. He will repeatedly do this hundreds (quite literally) times a day. I have raised the blinds now despite the fact that we now have no privacy, at least he can't do it. However now he just climbs on the window sill. He doesn't get bored, which I find strange, he would do it ALL DAY. What do I do? Spend as much time as possible out of the house? We go to soft play areas and such but he wants to climb to the top which I can't let him do as its dangerous.

I know there is nothing anyone can say and it's a phase but I can't cope and don't know what to do about it...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
funnychic · 08/01/2013 18:44

Buy him a baby trampoline, bouncing is believed to be very good for regulating emotions in toddlers and if nothing else it will wear him out for a while!!

BettyBum · 08/01/2013 18:49

Ooh a baby trampoline is a good idea. DD has one in garden but it's huge!

Now booking TumbleTots...

OP posts:
narmada · 08/01/2013 21:53

You have my sympathies, DSIL had a climber- bonkers - trying to get out of second floor windows, the lot. You may be depressed but I would guess it is largely to do with having a high-needs toddler.

No useful advice aside from that it will get better. DNeice is now far calmer at three.

Have you tried cutting out any e-numbers known to cause hyperactivity?

BettyBum · 08/01/2013 21:59

I think it is indeed my son and his climbing that makes me feel awful.

Everyone's advice and kind words have made me feel so much better...

Will look into his diet.

Am joining a tumble tots and saw another thread here when someone advised letting him go mad somewhere for a child who sounded similar. We live opposite a park and huge rec and although he loves to play on the park we rarely just play on the rec...

OP posts:
Sophiathesnowfairy · 08/01/2013 23:38

My DS was the,same and it was a shock after two girls,who stayed where you put them!

We got a plastic little tykes fort thing with a sloe and those foam mats with letters and numbers on and had it in the living room.

Surestart is a good idea ours do a soft play thing which is a bit smaller and less heart in the mouth!

You may also be able,to find a toddler gymnastics, or little kickers is great for active toddlers. Hang in there, once he has the concentration to play with stuff it will get easier.

Sophiathesnowfairy · 08/01/2013 23:39

A slide not a sloe Blush

MoelFammau · 09/01/2013 00:53

My 20mo DD climbed a 7m ladder yesterday. Took 3 of us to get her down.

Some kids climb. A LOT. Luckily, they usually seem pretty adept at it. DD has not fallen yet (though I couldn't take a repeat of yesterday any time soon!).

BettyBum · 09/01/2013 11:33

Well just to update we went to TumbleTots for a trial session this morning and it was FAB! DS loved it, climbed to his little hearts content! Fell asleep on way home and went straight down for nap when we got in. I'm so pleased I think I have found something to help him with his physical nature. I plan to take him every wed and DP will take him on a Friday if I happen to miss a session.

Will still take all the other ideas on board and when we have money will buy a mini trampoline and maybe the fort for our lounge as its quite big and he has a playroom too which I could probably fit something else in...

Thankyou all so much, you all really helped me yesterday when I was at my wits end and I shall save this thread for all the ideas!...

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 09/01/2013 11:48

My DD is 21 months and is also a fearless climber. She will often climb on the table, the back ridge of the sofa, the window sil. She has been doing this since she was about 16 months. I have noticed that she is worse when we have not been to the park or seaside. She is very active and needs to go out for exercise and fresh air once a day at least! I have an older DS (5) who was and still is keen on playing inside with toys so I do know how relentless it can feel. Is it an option to go to a park, even if it is slightly raining? I have an all in one waterproof outfit for DD and she doesn't care about it being wet- she loves it!

MulledWineAndScully · 09/01/2013 11:51

I've got a climber too, she's 15 months old but her strength and the situations she can get herself in absolutely amaze me. She will build her own 'stairs' out of books or toys or whatever she can find to climb up and over things. Amazingly she hasn't worked out how to get out of her cot [thankful for small mercies].

She got a baby trampoline for Xmas which she loves but I can't say it's stopped her climbing (sorry).

I'm sort of not worried about it because if she can get up then she can most likely get down, and I think all the climbing gets her nice and tired for bedtime. I'd love to take her to tumble tots or soft play but sadly I work full time so it's difficult. I'm definitely going to look into getting the fort mentioned above.

Biscuitsneeded · 09/01/2013 11:59

Can you do toddler swimming too? It tires them out nicely for a while..!

swanthingafteranother · 09/01/2013 12:12

another climber here! tables, bookcases, beds...
I think you have to just go with it, rather than restrain. Second plastic climbing frame indoors! Beds are good for climbing and bouncing on.
Folding chairs can replace heavy chairs(then you put them away after meals)

Climbing is a great skill for any child, it is brilliant for their development. Mine are much older now (10 and 12) but I remember all their friends were obsessively climbing too, both boys and girls. Real climbing is best too, tree trunks etc, those smooth round rocks in playgrounds, piles of cushions that you tumble off etc etc. Please look after yourself, and ENJOY!

SummerRainIsADistantMemory · 09/01/2013 12:45

Ds2 learned to climb stairs at 7 months, that was fun with a 3yo and 4yo who never remembered to close stair gates! I lost count of the number of times I turned my back on him for a second and found h ii m upstairs Blush

I found not stopping him climbing too often worked well, lots of safe places in the house he could climb meant Jr wa dd mote willing to listen if we said no. I was always pretty relaxed about table climbing with all mine and they got bored eventually.

Could you pay a mattress down under one window and pet hI'm climb on that sill if he wants?

SummerRainIsADistantMemory · 09/01/2013 12:50

Oh, and I should add, he's almost 4 now and doesn't climb anymore, he's actually fairly laid back now!

NeopreneMermaid · 14/01/2013 20:54

Sorry I'm a bit late but well done BettyBum on finding something that helps! Smile

doughnut44 · 14/01/2013 22:43

Glad you found something that keeps him happy. One thing I would say though is don't go too many times a week as he may get bored. Sometimes the local gymnastics centre does a soft play session which will be like tumbletots but without the structure x

stella1w · 14/01/2013 22:48

Ds same age won,t stop climbing. No advice just sympathy.

Branleuse · 14/01/2013 22:49

i had this with my daughter. Into absolutely everything. Exhausting!
it does pass.
it Will get better.

BettyBum · 22/01/2013 16:24

Aaarrrrrggghhh. Unfortunately tumble tots snowed off last week but hope to go tomorrow. He is driving me mad again today.

Taken all the chairs out of dining room again today. Just kills my back.

Have had little money for trampoline or fun fort thing.

Thanks for sympathy!

OP posts:
wiltingfast · 23/01/2013 08:44

To be honest, you should just let him at it. Be ready with kisses when he falls over. He will be fine.

wiltingfast · 23/01/2013 08:45

Even the chairs. Let him. He has to learn to live in his environment. A few bumps won't kill him!

wiltingfast · 23/01/2013 08:47

Cushion mountains v popular in our house too. Put all cushions, inc big sofa ones on floor and let 'em at it. ;)

TotallyBS · 23/01/2013 08:54

Get a play pen. We got one from John Lewis many moons ago. It was larger than the cheap ones at local shops so DS had lots of space to play in.

I would only leave him in there for short periods but about 30min break from having to worry or chase DS was enough for me to retain my sanity

Xenia · 23/01/2013 09:00

I always recommend mothers go back to full time work after they have babies as soon as possible as then this kind of stress is avoided and it is better for mother and child. That would be one solution and you might be a lot happier too.

gymboywalton · 23/01/2013 09:02

xenia-do you think maybe you could try saying something different for a change?