Normal 3 year old behaviour or ADHD?

[PoppyPrincess]

I have a 3 yo DS, he's a handful. Always has been really.
He can be lovely, very caring, very kind etc but his behaviour can be quite difficult.
Sometimes when I'm talking to him he just takes no notice at all, for example when we're getting ready in the mornings ''please can you put your shoes on? put your shoes on. can you put your shoes on please? Get your shoes on! Now!''
The mornings have now been pretty much sorted with a reward chart, he's now like a different child and wants to get ready.
But when we're out and about he can't just walk and hold my hand, well occasionally he does but most often it can be difficult to stop him from running off.
He's very intelligent and can enjoy an activity for quite a while I suppose it's more the hyperactivity and the way he ignores me a lot of the time that concerns me.
He's my first child so I've got nothing to compare with (yes I know you shouldn't compare) and my friends all have little girls and they're much calmer.
I've also noticed that he seems to have got worse over Christmas, I'm not sure if its anything to do with him eating too much chocolate and goodies or if its because a of all the excitement or because of the lack of routine, or even a combination of all 3?
I suppose I just need someone to tell me whether this behaviour is pretty standard from a 3 year old boy or if I should be concerned. And does anybody think its worth me cutting out / reducing chocolate in his diet?

If he responds to strategies then I don't think there's anything to worry about.

Once Christmas is over it will definitely be worth cutting down on chocolate and sweets, although I doubt that's really the problem. He is more likely bored or overwrought.

Does he go to nursery or pre-school? What do they think?

Yes he goes to nursery school (9-3 every day). I've not spoken to them specifically about his behaviour, they don't really tell us much unless we actually ask but I've always thought that if they had any concerns they would talk to me about it. But as far as I can gather he's pretty good in school.

I think you could be right about him being bored, he is very very bright and just thinks non-stop, constant questions about everything, from the very moment he wakes in the morning until the moment he falls asleep he's asking questions about everything. He can't just watch tv, he'll be asking questions ''who's that?'' ''What are they doing'' ''where are they?'' Etc etc. when we're driving he doesnt just sit enjoying the ride he'll be asking what the signs say, which way we're going, why can we go fast on the motorway etc. don't get me wrong it's great that he's so bright but they do say that bright kids can be hard work.

So maybe I just need to make more of an effort to stimulate him and engage him in things?

i think 3 is too young to diagnose adhd, i think age 3 that is the norm.

and of course chirstmas is an exciting time and you are right too much chocolate is bad for all of us. so it is likely tomake him hyper

His behaviour sounds standard for a 3 year old to me.

I have girls, but they are certainly not calm.

Don't buy into the bright = bored thing.

Bright children are good at finding things to keep themselves interested, and it sounds like he is plenty interested in the world.

3 year olds are great fun, but they can certainly be hard work.

I used to pretend our house was a space ship that was about to self-destruct every morning to get us out in the mornings. :o

"Oh no! Someone has pressed the self-destruct button again"

(Aside in robotic voice) "Twenty minutes to self destruct"

Then I'd keep counting down until coats and shoes were on and we were walking away from the house. Then we would watch it explode.

I remember noticing at a very young age that he seems sensitive to chocolate, it was a nightmare getting him to go to bed if he'd had chocolate anytime near bed time, whereas normally he goes to bed really well.

well save chocolate for an occasional treat, obviously you dont give it at bed time, you shouldnt eat it yoruself at bed time, it is a stimulant, and think of his teeth and not a good diet.

Yeh I never usually have it in the house as I do try and keep it as a treat and I have no self control so would eat it myself
But with it being Christmas and he's been given selection boxes etc its been like chocolate central in the house for the past week, I think next year I'm going to ask people not to buy him any.
He also goes to his Dad's once a week and from what I can gather he doesn't limit the amount of goodies he has, he gets ice cream for breakfast etc. but when DS comes back home he can be really difficult but it's hard to know whether that is because of his diet, from being tired or because of the emotions around going between mum and dad's houses.

probably all of the above, as you suspect.
cna you get books/guides/leaflets on healthy eating, sensible child care for your ex

or put it out of reach and ration it?

If he is used to children's company six hours a day then he will be unsettled by the holidays, obviously. Give him a week or two back in his normal routine and if there's no improvement talk to his keyworker first. They will have a better idea if he is "just being three" or actually displaying unusual traits.

And yes, engage with him more is a no-brainer. Children always behave better when their needs (note: not necessarily wants) are met.