Has this ever happened to you?

[peasabovesticks]

Ds had a few issues with a couple of mates. Nothing physical but a lot of ignoring, some name calling etc and no sign of it blowing over. He's obviously been really upset

Went into school for a really quick chat, all very low key, not accusatory, just a 'can we get this sorted' type of thing. School have spoken to the two boys today and I've had both mothers sending me pretty unpleasant texts, saying how they're going to tell their boys to keep away from ds (they already are ignoring him so how this will change things I don't know). One mum I'm pretty friendly with, other mum thinks I'm a thick peasant despite the fact I have three degrees and am three points off a genius IQ She has gone apeshit saying I'm making false allegations.

I didn't want to cause the boys trouble, just wanted it nipping in the bud. Just wondering if this is a common response or if I've just been really unlucky!

'disappointed'! I think I would have started laughing - who does she think she is, your mum?

Exactly purpleheadedmountain

If you knew her it would be no surprise she said that. I nearly actually said 'you're not my fucking mother' but I did manage to resist the urge

you did the right thing op! ignore the mums, deal with the school - and lots of luck, is not pleasant. boy in ds's class is routinely quite horrible to other dc - thing is with 10 year olds they do talk and analyse, my ds is beginning to find a little band of who support him (he was in tears today cos this boy was jumping around him calling him names but others went to get help)

peas - you were VERY restrained.

Do you have to see this harridan every day at pickup ?

I would have gone to the school. In fact when one of my friends dd's was picking on my dd I did go to the teacher despite having a good relationship with her mother as it was all happening at school.

Our clad has a phone list so we all have each others numbers.

You did the right thing by going to the school - you should never approach parents.

I would ignore, ignore, ignore BUT if they didn't back off I would be back up to the school and explain the situation. Our school would have them in the office so fast they wouldn't know what day of the week it was, and they would be told in no uncertain terms that their behaviour is threatening and if it didn't stop then there would be consequences.

It's great to hear people saying they think it was the right thing to do. The reaction from the other parents was so strong I did seriously doubt my decision but even the school themselves have said this morning, they feel it was appropriate.

Now of course I'm wondering how ds is getting on. Hopefully he's ok.

My theory is that you don't actually do the bullies any favours by letting them get away with it, either. They're not going to learn how to behave in the big bad world if they don't learn how to get on with people in the playground. Like I say to my boys, you have to learn to get on with other people because they've got you outnumbered!

It's also astoundingly naive to believe your child behaves exactly the same at school as he/she does at home. You'd think some people had never been a child with how little they understand what the little buggers dears get up to when you're not watching.

Hi, we'll be moving this to Behaviour soon.

Considering the nasty texts (? immature, should speak face to face like adults), it's no mystery from where the kids' bully-ish behaviour stems. Sorry you are going through this. Do what you can to ensure your child knows he is loved, very special, and that the world is full of people who would not treat him that way. My sister is going through this with her 6 year old son, he regularly sneaks by the school playground during breaks only to see her son sitting by himself by the fence. It's heart-breaking, and nipping it in the bud won't ensure it won't happen again in the future. Help your son develop the type of confidence to get past this. Hugs to you xx

I meant she regularly sneaks by the playground...