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Behaviour/development

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How to get a 3 y/o to sit still?

8 replies

FuckityFuckFuck · 20/11/2012 13:10

DS will be 4 in Feb and I have just got back from a meeting with his nursery teachers. They said lots of lovely things about him, kind, caring, very bright, gets on well with the other children but that we need to work at home to get him to sit still and focus more, and to stop shouting/making sure he is the loudest person in the room

Fair enough but I have been trying to do that since he started moving/speaking and I have run out of ideas!
They suggested getting a clock or egg timer and helping him to concentrate on one thing until the time runs out because he loves clocks/numbers - tried that.
They suggested having 'quiet time' every day where we read a book - tried that (although he is much better now at sitting still and reading me a story at bedtime)
They suggested having a set time every day to sit and do a puzzle/draw/paint - already have that as part of winding down before dinner
They suggested only speaking in quiet calm voices at home - already do that but he still shouts a lot (hearing is fine)

I can't think of anything else to try that I haven't already. I am going to get him a tablet computer for his birthday because he will sit and play with DP's mobile (he's got interactive books on there and he likes playing Angry Birds) and it seems to keep him focused for up to 10 minutes at a time but I don't want him constantly plugged into a computer.

If you read all that, well done

Help!

He really is quite clever (I think anyway, him being pfb and all)

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
FuckityFuckFuck · 20/11/2012 13:10

Ooops, posted too soon

but he seems to lak the concentration to focus on one thing at a time

OP posts:
StickEmWithThePointyEnd · 20/11/2012 13:15

Duck tape or a rope?

In all seriousness though, I'm watching with interest. Ds is 2 and I can well envisage having this problem in a couple of years.

FuckityFuckFuck · 20/11/2012 13:21

Staples were also considered at one point....... Grin

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MrsJamin · 20/11/2012 13:23

DS1 is a lively child and I have always tried to just do the physically-wear-him-out thing than try and get him doing something quiet. I think boys in particular need a lot of overall physical control and activity before they are ready to be quieter and concentrate on something. He's nearly 5 now and to be honest I think this approach has worked - he sits and reads book with me, draws for some time and in particular will sit and make models out of lego quietly for ages. I don't think you will get anywhere by trying to do quieter, calmer things when they obviously have a lot of energy to expend. Sometimes we just have to go out, whatever the weather, to post something or take the glass to be recycled. It really helps.

noblegiraffe · 20/11/2012 13:23

Crikey, 3 year olds aren't normally well known for their attention span are they? I wouldn't have thought that was a 'problem' that needed special attention.

The loud thing is annoying, however. Can you mime using a volume control on him (or something else that doesn't require you to be louder than him to be heard) and refuse to engage with him until he asks nicely in an 'indoor' voice?

FuckityFuckFuck · 20/11/2012 16:37

I think I'll try for the physical ativity to see if that works. I've treid every quiet method I can think of - Thanks

The being loud/shouting is extremely annoying. I usually only respond with 'speak to me nicely' when he is shouting but that doesn't seem to be working so I might swap it for a volume control or something visual to see if he adjusts to that instead

I didn't think he was that much different from his friends, he is certainly not the first one to start charging about in the playground every morning for example

OP posts:
butterflyexperience · 20/11/2012 17:43

Hahaha-getting a lively child to sit still
Do tell me when you find out what works so I can apply to my own dc...

MrsJamin · 21/11/2012 06:52

He's not unusual at all. I do think boys need a lot more wild time before they can calm down and do more quiet activities - it's something to do with not so much connection between the right and left sides of the brain, and physical activity helps the connections to be made so the brain works better for other activities later on.

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