tantrums in 17 month old - how do you deal with them?

[lu9months]

my 17 month old ds has always been a placid happy little chap - until a few weeks ago! he has started to have daily tantrums, throwing his food and drink on the floor at lunch and supper, and having full blown screaming fits - he doesnt seem to know what he wants, and cannot be distracted. I have to wait for it to blow over, which can take 20-40 mins, and then he will let me cuddle him. before this, he pushes me away. I am finding it very hard to cope with, especially since he has a full-on 3 yr old brother, who he no doubt copies! help please!

Hi Lu, this sounds very similar to my DS though his tantrums never went on so long. What I did (and maybe this worked so well that his tantrums were that much shorter!) was to give him time out in his room (would only be one minute for your DS) I would do all the usual distraction type things, and then would ignore him - however, sometimes he would follow me round to try to hit me or whatever, so at that point I would get down to him, look him in the eye and tell him I had had enough of this - time to stop, otherwise he would have a minute on his own in his room to calm down.

Quite often he would still be ranting when he came out but at much less intensity, and most times he would be pretty much ready for a cuddle.
I found it was being on his own that did it, because with other people around he just found stuff to 'feed' his anger. HTH?

i feel for you lu9months, my ds 17thmonths has tantrums but luckily for me its mainly head banging which he stops when he hurts himself. he really does headbutt! he also squeals v.loudly which is earpiercing but he only does it for not even a minute so i am v.lucky and hope he stays like this/ not forever of course

make sure hes safe when hes doing it and stand back i would say!good luck, hope it doesnt last too long

meant to say, my DS is now three and a half and tantrums have really disappeared - he can still get cross, but nowhere near these 'beside themselves with anger' moments!

It will pass!

Have you still got your 0-5 book. the advice in there is very good. Basically, it's just frustration, let them get it out but be on hand to comfort them if they need it. It's a tough time being 17 months. Mine's 18 months by the way..