2.6 year old and children who snatch

[eastendgirl]

My ds who is 2.6 often has toys snatched from him; until a while ago he used to just stand and stare when it happened, didn't seem bothered, now he often cries inconsolably. What am I supposed to say to him? Today my friend's son who is about the same age snatched a toy from him, I tried to console him telling him it didn't matter because it is true that it does not matter. Then I lost my temper with my friend's ds who is about the same age and often snatches whatever my ds has in his hands and snatched the toy back and gave it back to my ds. The mother of this boy never really tells her son off when he does this, only asks him gently "darling, do give the toy back...", of course it's a bloody year now and the kid has never given anything back. I feel exageratedly angry about this. My friend also told me that I should not have snatched the toy from her son because my ds needs to learn to do it himself! I say bollocks to that. Would like other people's opinions. God I am rambling.

sorry, must have pressed too many times, feeling a bit stressed.

mmm its difficult. I would have said we need to share toys so let x have a turn the you can hav it back. then i would have made sure they did take turns. I do think your friend should have said something to her nds..if she is a good friend would she mind u saying to her ds he must not snatch?

Poor you, eastendgirl! The whole sharing thing is a nightmare isn't it?
IME children don't really 'get' sharing till they're 3 or 4 BUT it really helps if the parents get in there and show them how it's done!
Always trickiest when a friend's child is snatching from your child and your friend does nothing. But perhaps next time you could say to the child, 'Oh, I think (your ds) was playing with that. Why don't you play with this instead?' Even if it doesn't work, at least you're voicing your concern in front of your friend and she (hopefully) will take that as a cue to step in herself.
Sometimes, when I have little ones round to play, I use a kitchen timer to 'help' them share - 'you play with it till the bell rings, then it's his turn'. Worth a try?

i agree with julieb, sharing is a skill & it has to be learnt, i don't think my children really got this until 3+.

Whenever i've had friends round to play with my children i've sat on the floor & taken the lead to supervise the shared toy...there will be tantrums from the child who doesn't have it in their possesion but that's fine, they are only airing their frustration.

There was a great thread i remember once about 'toddler rules', it had me in stitches. I'll see if i can find it.

\link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=2260&threadid=75478\here it is, very funny!}