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Behaviour/development

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2yo suddenly ignoring me

5 replies

EyesDoMoreThanSee · 20/08/2012 23:00

DD is two and two weeks. she has always been a can sleeper, very very spirited, into everything, walked early and as yet has few words. we have never over baby proofed the house, preferring instead to teach her what she can and can't play with.

prior to her birthday she knew not to touch the oven or turn on the gas hob, she left our books alone and read hers, she was hard work and 'naughty' but since her second birthday she has become a bloody nightmare!

I cannot now leave her anywhere in the house for even a second, she actively seems to seek out the very things we ask her not to do. she is incredibly destructive, ripping paper, throwing objects, pulling open drawers and cupboards, climbing on tables and tv stands.

alongside this the requests to desist whatever she is doing are met with a blank look and a deliberate repeat of whatever she is being asked not to do. I don't want to use no and stop continually but they now have no effect at all. I distract wheneever I can but I am now having to keep her away from playdates because I cannot control her and after a young baby was hurt by her (I fully accept responsibility as she is my child ) then I am wondering how do I deal with this latest phase?

my mother was a poor example and smacked and hit us as punishment so I am a bit lost. naughty step and time out do not work as she does not have the verbal skills !

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NCForNow · 21/08/2012 00:14

She's not destructive, she's looking for something to do and to learn. Move paper work that's important, move ornaments...the climbing...it's normal and you perhaps need to make sure climable furniture is bolted down and that tvs are safe...wall mounted is best...the thought of them falling on a climbing toddler is terrible.

Has she got enough interaction with you in the daytime? Are you giving her things she CAN rip? Crayons? Paint? Some stuff in the garden that's safe to climb on?

When you tell her to stop, if she doesn't, pick her up and show her something more interesting that she is allowed to play with.

Imo toys are often dumped for "real" objects at this age and that's when a treasure box of crap things like empty cotton reels, empty tubs, carboard rolls, scraps of fabric, pine cones etc can be really useful.

Mine also loved sitting with a load of tupperware, some dry pasta and beans etc and some scoops and spoons.

EyesDoMoreThanSee · 21/08/2012 07:46

thank you for answering

she has lots of fun creative crayons, paint and paper but I have to be with her to do thorn activities because she still chews everything.

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EBDTeacher · 21/08/2012 09:14

How much exercise and fresh air is she getting? My DS is exactly the same age and needs tonnes of exercise. I literally walk him twice a day like a dog in the woods or safe parks where he can run about and climb as much as he needs to. It helps- on days when he doesn't get his exercise he can be a beligerent nightmare at home.

greenhill · 21/08/2012 09:31

Sounds normal, she's using selective deafness to get your attention / blanking you and pushing the boundaries.

It can be a horrible time as you have to pick your battles and choose what to react to. Intervene before a situation gets out of hand.

I had to anticipate everything...this is not always nice as you assume the worst is going to happen when a toddler lunges, then they suddenly hug/ kiss another child and you feel proud of them again...phew!

You can't exercise them too much, toddlers need almost continuous stimulation. A good walk, visit the park, shopping trip that can be cut short when bad behaviour surfaces, then jigsaws, colouring books, some noisy toys, then sitting still with a storybook...you will flag first though!

Then they get more vocal and you can reason with them much more as they're not quite so reliant on how they feel at that exact moment. CBeebies can almost hypnotise them if you choose the right programmes...

Katiebeau · 21/08/2012 10:52

Agree re the box of cardboard tubes, pastry brushed. Wooden spoons and pans! They love them.

Baby proofing is necessary so you can move from their side for a second Grin

Do it for your sanity.

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