Going to see a counsellor with DS2(8) tomorrow - any experiences you'd share?

[PacificDogwood]

What should I ask/say?

I've posted about DS2 before on here: he is lovely in many ways, but also very unhappy, has low self-esteem ('I am ugly, fat and stupid' when he is nothing of the kind), emotionally quite immature in that he can still have screaming tempertantrums when things don't go his way and (our main problem and reason for seeking help) he cannot abide his 4 year old brother and at times is very mean and also physically violent towards him .

It is typical that we just had a really nice weekend with no real upset and the appointment is tomorrow...

It is a Primary Care Counsellor, attached to DS's school we are going to see tomorrow. I will talk to her first alone, then with DS2. And maybe DS1 who goes to the same school.

Not sure why I am posting this, but I am now a bit nervous about it.
Thank you for any thoughts.

Too late on a school night?

Not to worry. Night-night x.

PacificDogwood sorry to hear you are having problems. We have had ongoing problems with our DD (aged 7) for a couple of years now. We have seen the school worker and she is lovely and helpful.

Try not to be too nervous, write down all you want to ask, say etc and take a pen and paper with you to note down stuff when you talk to her alone.

Just remember you want to help your little boy to deal with his conflicting emotions, help him to feel confident etc and you want to know how you can deal best with things etc etc. You are taking charge of a difficult situation and the aim is to do the very best for your son. So although you are nervous you are a good mum for facing this difficult problems head on.

Really hope it will be helpful to all of you in the family. We are still working through things but it is definitely better getting help along the way.

All the best.

Well, it turns out it was too late me me - thanks, Italiangreyhound, for your thoughts.

He knows we are going and I have said that it is an attempt to help us all to help him be happier. I do not want him to feel that we think there is something 'wrong' with him IYKWIM.

Hey ho, we'll see how it goes. I have to take his 4 and 2 year old brothers with me as well - that's going to be interesting...

Hope it goes well.

It was fine, thanks.
Really more of a Getting-to-know-you session than anything too profound and soulsearching.
DS said, when asked what he would like the counsellor to change if she could: "The weather" .
Not sure he entirely gets what this is supposed to all be about, but then he said tonight he is looking forward to next week's session on his own.

We have a lot of similar issues with DS (8). Emotional immaturity, low self esteem, tantrums and aggressive behaviour with his sister and the rest of the family. Am interested that the counsellor is using those counselling methods with your DS. We have wondered about seeking help for help but still trying to deal with it ourselves.

Our DS's behaviour very much fits with this www.greatschools.org/parenting/teaching-values/796-anger-overload.gs

Hope he finds the next counselling session useful..

*help for him

Glad it went well. Hope it continues well.

Oh PD it sounds a bit complicated. Hope he gets things clearer and you can figure out what's hiding beneath the behaviour.