DD is 5 she is not 'naughty' but her behaviour and attitude is driving me to nuts and im ashamed to say im starting to dislike her company. I know it is an awful thing to say as a mother but she is constantly shouting/screaming/crying.
As a background, she has always been very 'fiery' tempered. Wasnt the happiest baby (colic for months) and as she's got older hasnt really perked up! As an example today i had to take her and ds (3) to work with me this mroning. I told them both if they behaved they could get a small treat from the party bag shop next door (everythings about 20-25p). Ds has been good, dd on the other hand , screamed at me when a customer came in, hit her brother, whinged and moaned for treats/toys/sweets etc. When told no this resulted in foot stamping and more whinging!
My dad came to collect them, she said ashe didnt want to go with him but unfortunately she doesnt have a choice as i have work to do. They were both told if they stood nicely with GD whilst i gathered their bits they could take their scooters with them. DD started screaming saying she wanted to stay with me (not an option) after 2 warnigns she was told if she didnt stop she would no longer be allowed to take her scooter. She continued to scream so was carted off by my dad without it, screaming like she was being abducted.
Even my family have noticed how she reacts/behaves. Its hard to describe but when she's with my mum, sisters or my friends mum who all dote on her she is good as gold but not for us at home or for her grandad. Consequences for her actions are always followed through, like with her scooter, but she just hasnt learned that this behaviour gets her nothing! We go through this daily! So given this beahviour ahs been going on for 2 years daily i thought she may have learned by now!
What im worried about is that she is now saying 'why are you always nice to ds but not me' and 'why do you always tell me off and not ds'. He does as he's told and generally is a well behaved quiet little boy, i am aware this may change, but i think she thinks i favour him but i cant tell him off when he's stood nicely as i asked! We are a very close family (im one of eight) and see each other all together once a week. this behaviour has become more noticeable in the last 2 years as she will always have one of these screaming fits when we're all together. My BIL unhelpfully suggested we should smack to discipline, which neither of us agree with, but i have no idea how to get her to understand this behaviour deosnt get her what she wants.
I should go home later with a little something for ds, as they were both told they would get something if they behaved from next door, but im worried it looks like im favouring him. i cant win even though she was told, as she always is, there are consequnces for her behaviour!!
sorry if this is too rambly im at wits end with her!