16mo who doesnt sleep!

[justtired]

Hi all,
Im getting slightly desperate for a good nights sleep. I have a 16mo and a 6yr old and a 2 bed house so the baby is still in with us. He won't go to bed until he literally drops which is really late and then he tosses and turns all night and wakes up screaming and I mean screaming, I have no idea why, he shouldn't be hungry or thirsty because he eats plenty and has milk throughout the day and,before bed time.
I need to try something and I feel my options are controlled crying to get him to bed earlier and on a routine and keep him in our room, or try him in with his brother but Im worried he will wake him up and the older one tries to get in his cot or wake him in the morning when he has come in our room, I feel the 16mo is too young for a bed though.
Any one with any ideas, suggestions or experience I would be very grateful!
Thanks

What kind of routine do you currently have (milk before bed, the time you settle down with him, etc.)?

He doesn't really have a routine at all, this is what Im looking to change really because he had constant ear infections for months and he was in agony lying down so I used to keep him up till he dropped, now the ear infections have cleared up but he is still up till all hours because if I try and put him in his cot he goes mad x

Does he have a nap in the day?

My advice would be to settle him into a routine in the evening. What kind of time would you like him to get to sleep?

He does sleep in the day but not really a proper nap as he usually gets woken up. I am going to try and start a routine but not sure whether to keep him in with me or if he would be better with his brother?

The screaming etc would worry me. Sounds like something might be up.

Are you sure his ears are ok? Any food intolerances?

And yes put him in a routine. One nap a day at 12/1pm plus a set bedtime should be feasible.

I've always settled my kids into a routine by giving them a bath a couple of hours before bedtime, put them into their pyjamas, and make sure they know it's getting towards bedtime (turn the lighting down in the living room, close the curtains, if you have the tv on, turn the volume down, or turn it off altogether). Then give then some warm milk to drink in the living room, and when they've finished, read them a book. I always let my kids fall asleep on me, until they were about 2years old. I then just put them to bed.

That's just me, I know some parents might disagree with this.