My 4 month old doesn't nap - should I encourage him?

[HenriettaChicken]

I have a lovely 4 month old DS - our first child. He is amazing. He sleeps 10 hours without waking through the night (usually 9.30-7.30 ish) feeds well and is a happy and contented boy. He has not yet had any sickness.

In short, we are loving it.

But...he hardly naps in the day, unless we go on a car journey. Occasionally the pram will help him doze off, but this is happening less since he has graduated from a cocoon in the pram to sitting up with straps. Yesterday he slept from 3.45-4.00pm, and from 7.00-7.15pm. And that was it. 30 minutes for a 4 month old! He can get a bit cranky, and then I tend to offer the boob - which he is always happy to accept!

The question I have is, does this matter? As he is happy and sleeps so well at night, do I just accept that he doesn't sleep in the day? I usually try to get him to sleep downstairs in his vibrating chair, swing or playmat during the day, so he can distinguish between 'day' and 'night'. Should I take him up to his cot for daytime naps?

Can you tell I've not done this before?!

I think if you're happy with him not sleeping much in the day, you should keep doing what you're doing and not worry about it.

If he was over-tired, you would know about it as he'd be irritable, and it doesn't sound as if he is.

Continue to enjoy him I'd say, trying to change his sleep will only give you stress.

Naps produce more REM sleep which is good for brain development, but if you are happy with how he is doing, I'd go with your instincts.

You might find this article helpful and have you read No Cry Nap Soluction. If he isn't sleeping so well in his pushchair, have you thought of using one where he can face you?

If you want to help him distinguish between day and night, taking him outside first thing and before bath and bed usually works a treat .

Thanks, Lyra and Julie. He is currently lying in his soft ring playing with his bib and his toes! I have put on soft classical music and drawn the curtains. I even lay down beside him for a while - and opened my eyes to find a big toothless grin awaiting me! Little monkey ;)

I can tell you one thing - this setting is making me feel sleepy anyway!

I had heard a similar thing regarding REM sleep, Julie, which is what made me think it would be a good idea to have at least one nap in the day. Thanks for the links - I have looked them up.

As for my instincts...who knows! Generally he's really content, although he has his moments of getting cranky (but then, he's 4 months - it could all be teething related anyway!)

Go to sleep, little boy...

Still awake. Not a second of napping since 7.30am. Nearly 9 hours. Tried putting him down as he's clearly exhausted and he screamed louder and seemingly angrier than I have ever heard before. Heartbreaking. Am now feeding. Again.

I'm knackered. And so emotionally drained seeing my little one so upset.

When you've finished his feed, I'd change him and take him out in the car if possible. It does seem a bit unlucky that the bfs don't send him off HC. You have my sympathy.

Just had a look in the No Cry Sleep Solution and the average is 3 naps of 5 to 6 hours in total with 10 to 11.5 hours at night. Obviously though, not all babies are the same.

Thanks Julie. He didn't go down after his feed, but DH offered me some respite. He works from home & could hear things weren't going well & DS was distressed, so looked after him for a while so I could have a bath & unwind. He eventually fell asleep at 5.30 for an hour.

We've been for a lovely walk this evening..it stopped raining! Now he's much more relaxed & having his final feed before bed.

I'm sure there must be a reason for this - his usual sparse napping could just be the way he is, but no naps for 10 hours & the amount of tears. I wonder if it's teething (my reason for everything at the mo)

Glass of wine & early night for me I think.

He sounds like my son, Henrietta - almost five months, generally sleeps from 8.30 or 9pm to around 7 am, a happy wee soul, and not one of life's natural nappers!

He used to get through the day on a couple of 20-minute catnaps at a time when we were being told that a baby couldn't/ shouldn't be awake for more than two hours at a go, but in the last few weeks, he has actually started to nap slightly more, possibly because as he gets stronger and more wriggly, he's more tired...? It doesn't seem to have any effect on his sleep at night.

But my baby never dozes off in his cot in daytime, only on me or in his pushchair.

My DD never went in her cot in the daytime either, she either slept on me, in the car, sling or pushchair.

Peevish that does sound like us! Have been on a trip in the car today and spent some time outside (DS in bouncy chair) and so far no naps at all! He did sleep from 8.50pm-9.45am with only one feed at 6.30 though - so perhaps I shouldn't be that surprised!

The difference between today & yesterday, though, is that I've not tried to get him to sleep. He was almost nodding after a feed a few hours ago, but when I put him down he woke up straight away & was clearly not tired. So I've gone with his routine. As a result we have a happy boy & a far less stressed me!