DS being smacked

[Fazerina]

DS is 15 months and a very lovely, active, friendly and happy little boy. He is very keen to make friends with everyone and doesn't seem to have any stranger anxiety whatsoever. I know that at this age it is very difficult for most kids to share their toys, but for some reason DS doesn't seem to have developed that problem yet and that makes it easier for him to interact with other children, as he doesn't really mind when they take his toys.

There is a boy, who lives close to us and we see him and his mommy and little sister (just a few weeks old) almost every day. This boy is 23 months and very sweet and active. However, for some reason I've always got the feeling that he doesn't like my DS. It's probably started, as my DS has tried to borrow some of his toys many times, but the same time I give some of DS's toys to the other boy, but he's never really happy with that. Recently he's started smacking my DS at every turn and most of the time DS isn't anywhere near his toys. A couple of days back my DS was standing close to the other boy and for no reason whatsoever he just turned and smacked DS in the face. DS is very sensitive and started crying hysterically and wouldn't stop for about 15 minutes. It was all very heartbreaking and awful:(..

I just want to know how I should deal with this.. The other boy's mom is pretty good about intervening and telling the boy off, but I think he's still a bit young to grasp the idea of discipline etc. And my DS is now afraid of the boy, but I don't want to have to avoid them, as I have nothing against the family and we all live so close to each other.

Perhaps seeing them almost daily is too much? I know that my DC wouldn't cope well with that. We see friends on average once a week or once every two weeks! That's plenty in my opinion.

I would reduce visits to once or twice a week and meet on neutral ground.

Agree about frequency of contact and was also wondering if the boy's behaviour has cranked up a big since his little sister was born? A friend of mine's dd became horribly aggressive towards babies when she became a big sister.

Thanks for your replies!

Sorry I wasn't really clear with my post re.seeing this boy almost daily.. We don't actually visit this other boy, we see them in the commucal garden in the house we all live in. We tend to go to a toddler group or the park etc. With DS in the mornings, but in the afternoons if the weather is nice we usually just go down to our garden, as there's always children there from the house and there's a small playground. I could of course take DS to the nearby park in the afternoon, but it would feel awkward, as we would have to walk past everyone else in our garden and I'm sure after a while it would become obvious I'm trying to avoid this boy.

I asked the mom if she thought the boy might be a bit jealous and on edge in general because of the new baby, but she said she didn't think so, as the boy had behaved in this way already before the sister was born..

I'm not really blaming the boy or his mom, as I think she's doing all she can to be on top of his behaviour. I actually feel quite sorry for her, as I think she has enough on her plate already with the new baby and a very active toddler, who still needs a lot of care at that age.

I just feel quite upset for DS, as he really was heartbroken and so sad this other boy doesn't want to be his friend and doesn't like him. I'm not really sure how I could explain it to him, seeing he doesn't speak yet and probably wouldn't understand what I'm saying. I know DS really likes this other boy and is generally trying very hard to impress him. I notice this, as whenever the other boy is running or playing about in a silly way, DS tries to join in and do the same and make the other boy laugh, but he just stops immediately and either runs away or tries to push or smack DS.

I think you need to get the confidence up to go to the park when you want and feel that you CAN indeed walk past everyone else! I mean they don't know where you are going....you might be visiting someone or going to the shop!

Your neighbours shouldn't have that much influence over what you do.

Since your DS seems to like this child...and he is smacking...I would simply avoid for a while. Try to go to different places...