Desperate for some help with my 13 month olds eating

[Cupcakemummy85]

Hi everyone, this is my first time on here so be gentle with me lol. I really need help with my daughter. She is 13 months old and ever since her jabs 4 weeks ago she doesn't want to b spoon fed anymore. That means, no yogurts, no weetabix or any of that kind of thing and no home cooked stews etc. if I give her a spoon she can't get the hang of it gets angry and gives up. A bit like me really ha ha. It's so frustrating because I'm running out of ideas and if I cook her finger style foods like pasta she eats about three pieces and is done. I've tried eating dinner with her as a family, leaving her to get on with it. Nothing works. I've had to give her an extra milk which means she gets three because I worry she isn't getting enough. Is anyone else going through this. I've scoured the Internet, asked health visitors, nothing really works. Some advise would really be so appreciated as I'm seriously at breaking point here!!

Cupcake, my DD went through a phase like this for 2 weeks or so, and it turned out she wanted to feed herself with the spoon, rather than have me do it. Could that be it?

In the meantime i'd make some fishcakes, potato wedges, falafel, strips of chicken, homemade meatballs...and see if any of those grab her attention. She will get over this stage, but I think it can stem from desire for independance but inability to actually grasp it!

OR- could she be teething? DD can go off spoons when teething too.

Good luck

Have you tried loading the spoon and handing it to her? I found that giving my DS a spoon to hold himself, and then loading another spoon for him, kept him happy and he gradually learned to use his spoon himself.

I'd also say give her a go at yoghurt and Weetabix anyway - if my DS is anything to go by, you can eat them just fine without a spoon ...

Hi filling her up with extra milk will not encourage her to eat. I would not worry just keep trying the finger foods, she will eat or ask for food if she is hungry. Or if she asks for extra milk just give her food instead, like save the rest of the pasta so she can eat it later.

Is she OK in herself? My dd was poorly and then generally off-colour for weeks after her jabs and I think it did affect her eating. Are there any foods your dd likes still? (in her fussy phases my dd will usually still eat tinned mandarin, strawberries and breadsticks, and those goodies snacks...)

With the wanting to use a spoon thing, what worked with my dd was loading the spoon for her and putting it in the bowl so she could pick it up and do the rest. My dd also enjoys using a fork - before she got the hang of it herself I'd spear a chunk of food on it for her and put it in the bowl as above - better than a spoon I found, it's less frustrating as it doesn't fall off.

If I'm worried about dd's food intake (like if she's teething and fussy) I offer healthy snacks more often than usual, she'll often nibble a bit while sitting on my lap reading a story etc.

mine went off his food at this age and full appetite didnt come back for a long time, but I did find it helpful to keep a 'food diary' for a while so I could see what he was actually eating so I didnt panic! Its usually a bit more than you think it is, they don't need loads at this stage. Also it gave me an idea of textures and tastes he did and didnt like, as they're exercising their newly found need for independence at this age as well all of a sudden.
Mine used weetabix as a learning food for spoons, as it sticks well to the spoon so even when he put it in upside down he got a fair bit in the mouth as well! Finger foods are very good at this stage, squares of bread with soft cheese or marmite or peanut butter (full of good fats for growth) worked well here, pieces of cooked fruit like apple or pear that they can hold in their hand, banana, ricecakes, oaty bars, breadsticks, crackers, fruit bread, cheese on toast, even slices of cooked-well omelette could work and you can add diced veg and cheese to that, mine liked to hold a small slice of that cold. Some kids like a stick of cucumber or even carrot, although mine never did. Falafels are good warmed through and cut in half to nibble on. Pasta is a firm favourite these days but you might want to stick to finger food picnic meals for a minute, don't bother overloading them with choices. I didnt give extra milk as he was quite happy with just milk and would leave everything else! DS is 2.8 now and has quite a good appetite and a fair spread of tastes so it can and does get better :)

I agree with Brightonbleach - DS (now 23 months) went off his food at about the same age and it's been a bit hit and miss ever since, but he has good days and bad days so I try not to stress - easier said than done though! He eats well with a spoon now but sometimes just can't be bothered - esp when nearing the end of a yogurt (fist goes into pot, smears it all over his arm with his lips....yum!). But I remember what a shock it was when he went from being perfectly happy to eat whatever I shovelled into him up till around 13 months to suddenly not wanting to be spoon-fed but couldn't feed himself. It does pass but it's very frustrating at the time.