Greetings, fellow cake baking wenches of this fine site, I come to you tonight with a problem, and here it is:
I'm searching high and low for love on a dating site and came across a genuine fiend... a fiend so grotesque, girls, that I can hardly do him justice, but allow me to suggest that I had little doubt as to what his intentions were. Sadly, however, he's not actually the problem.
Nay, the problem is his 7 year old son who, the father claims, is obtaining gratification of a sexual nature from my picture! What to do, girlfriends, what to do? I cannot let this slide, for we are women, not mere objects. Let us rise up, rip some balls off and eat them like the rampant, hormonal psychopaths we are. Or you could just offer some parenting advice which I could politely pass on to he of the rotten sack so that it may, with time, shoot forth purity.
Thanks,
Lucy.