Pointing???

[Lily86]

Hi my son is 21 months and i have noticed he still dosent point to things that he wants like his juice if its out of reach. He will usaully look at me and moan then look at his juice he does however point to things if we are in the shops or if we at someones house he will point to their cup etc he dosent point to buses, planes he will just look. Sometimes its like he is just sticking his finger out and not actually pointing. Does anyone else have wee ones that are like this? X

My little boy didn't point for ages. Was getting quite worried as he didn't seem to be interested in any form of communication - wasn't talking, wouldn't do signs, didn't point, didn't wave etc. As far as I could see, after lots of talking to others and worrying (!) this seemed to be down to two things (1) he's a very chilled out little chap and was perfectly content without communicating, and (2) I was generally anticipating his every need before he got bothered enough to point or indicate in any other way that he wanted something, partly because he was so laid back.

Started asking him if he wanted his cup rather than just giving it to him, and trying to demonstrate conversation, and waiting for a response. Also, giving choices and getting him to point to what he wants, and then hopefully try and say the word too (recommended by speech therapist) e.g. do you want apple or banana? do you want the car or the train?

He's now 3, and much better at saying what he wants .. "I want .." is one of his favourite phrases now! His speech is still a bit behind other children, but there doesn't seem to be an actual problem (been assessed by various professionals).

You don't say whether your son is trying to talk at all. Does anything above sound like him? If he's not trying to communicate at all, like my little one wasn't, it might be worth going to a speech and language drop-in if you have one near you. Ours are run through the local Sure Start Children's Centre.

Does he point at things in books? You could try actually holding his hand to show him what you mean when you say "Point to the train" or "Show me the car". (Be consistent about whatever phrase you use.) Took my son ages to do that too, but there's nothing wrong with his intelligence or learning or observational skills. He either didn't get it or simply didn't want to for some reason. He's great on his colours now, and loves learning his numbers. Recognises a few letters too.

Hope this is helpful.

Hi thank u for reply :) my little one does wave, clap etc he is behind on speech though he only has on average 10 words he does understand what im saying to him most of the time it was the lack of pointing which was concerning me as i see so many kids younger than him pointing to things and my son just dosent do this when sees something he will occasionally point to things in a book ( he dosent really sit still long enough to look at books lol) Do u know if this can be linked to lack of speech? I do tend to just get him what he wants which maybe dosent help i will start trying to get him to point tell me what it is he is wanting and hopefully that will help. What age did your son start pointing?

Sorry i ment to say would the lack of pointing maybe be linked to his lack of speech? X

Can't remember when my son started pointing, but I know he didn't say his first word (car) until he was around 2.3. He still doesn't point much - just not his preferred way of communicating I suppose.

I'm not aware of a lack of pointing being specifically linked to slower speech, but not an expert in this area! Could be as all part of communicating, but doesn't mean that there's any sort of communication issue (so don't start panicing that he's showing autistic traits or something, like I was!). The most likely explanation for both is that he's just a bit slower to start pointing and talking than other kids, for no particular reason, and will catch up well before school age. Does tend to run in families apparently. Were you or your husband or siblings or aunts and uncles slower to talk than average?

Have you seen a speech therapist? If your son is starting to talk anyhow then it's maybe not such an issue, but it can be good to chat with one just to get advice and encouragement on how to help your son. In our area (Cambridgeshire) you don't have to have a specific referral to go along to the drop-ins, nor any condition. Your HV should know if there are drop ins available in your area.

Hi thank u for replying i feel a lot more reassured now. I had spoke to my Health visitor previously and she said that if he turns 2 and his speech still hasnt got any better she would refer him to speech therapy so still got a few months to wait so hoping he will catch up. I had trouble with speech when was younger i didnt talk till was 3 i had hearing tests etc and speech therapy i just turned out to be a lazy speaker so my son maybe gets it from me. X