My nearly 6 yo DS wants to look at boobies...

[minko]

and bottoms and winkies (his name for female bits!)

He is quite determined about it. I've tentatively suggested he can inspect me and his sister, but he keeps asking if he can look at DD's friends if they come for a sleepover, or even one of his friend's mums!

I suggested we get a book from the library if he's curious about bodies and he quickly told me he only wants to look at 'ladies bottoms'...

All quite entertaining but slightly disturbing. Is this normal for a nearly 6 yo boy???

Dear lord.

Ds is currently fascinated by womens bodies. Its natural, hormone surges etc.

But we have countered that by talking about respect, feelings and privacy.

If he has questions, I answer. But by laughing etc you are encouraging inappropriate behaviour.

Minko - don't feel tearful! It is soooo hard to convey a full story online. Most people understand that. I am sure your home is a warm, loving and safe place.

You have told him about privacy and offered books and it is only the continued excessive interest which is making you wonder what else/next you can try.

So, give him appropriate social cues (natural shock at the suggestion) talk to him to see of there is a simple trigger for this which you could dispel (playground chat?) and speak to doctor incase there is a physical reason.

Those are 3 good things a Mum can do. Most likely it will get sorted and won't become a problem.

minko sorry you feel tearful. Children are naturally very curious about things. your ds is probably just going through a phase of learning about private parts and has got himself into a bit of a pickle. I actually think it's a good thing that you find it quite entertaining and are not overreacting or making it all shameful and secret.

He does need to learn about what's private and what's not, as do all children. I would probably teach him about different bits using a book and if he wants to see the real thing to say that some things are private and lots of people don't like their private parts being looked at or whatever.

I'm not sure there's loads wrong with the idea of him looking at your bits. we're quite a naked sort of house and have always shared baths and beds and so have had 'yikes' moments when DCs try to play with our or each others' bits (they are much younger than yours). we have tried to quietly teach about privacy without shock horror or laughter. DS is now 4 so we do use opportunities to talk about boundaries, because we really want him to be able to tell us if anything inappropriate happens when he's not with us.

DS is currently obsessed with my breasts. It drives me bananas. I assume it's because his sister is breastfed.

Has your ds heard or learned something from an older child at school or at a friend's house? It sounds like big brother chat to me.
x

I also think Minky is trying to strike a balance between not making the whole thing of bodies dirty whilst trying to encourage appropriate modesty. It would be a tightrope if your dc was mightily fascinated, as in this case.

I am sure she wouldn't be chuckling while the sister was inspected on a slab! Lets not get too carried away.

Lets take it that inspected wasn't meant literally and see what suggestions to a normal Mum whose child is over-interested in something we have.

It could have been eating soil, or having to have all toys lined up exactly right... etc etc. Sometimes kids just get over-into something, it doesn't mean there is something dodgy going on.

I thought your post was quite funny OP and I didn't get the impression you'd reacted inappropriately. Obviously you have told him he can't ask to see the bits of random girls/women.

Is it possible he's trying to confirm or understand something in particular, e.g. pubic hair? If, say, he's only seen you and his sister naked, and you remove pubic hair, but someone at school has said his mum is hairy down there. Could there be a question like this at the root of it? I would have thought a good book with a few clear photos of real naked men and women might help to sort things out. Even though he said he wasn't interested in a book, you can explain that live models are not available!

One of my boys has huge curiosity, I think he'll end up with high sex drive in later years. I'm afraid he's stuck with books for details, though.

My other boys are only mildly curious or privately would-never-talk-to-mum-about-it curious.

I would tell him quite firmly that he cannot look at other people's private bits, but you can go to the library and get an anatomy book to look at together.

Sure we're not all giving you your kicks here op?

Christ - and you consider your sons potential future sex drive?

What's wrong with you people?

I agree with MyTits.

That's a hilarious post LissiesAWenlockLass

Heavens alive. What on earth is wrong with musing - privately - about your children's future libido? It is a part of someone's character as much as anything else and I wouldn't see this as any different at all from musing, say, about my child's likely academic strengths and weaknesses.

OP I think you have been given quite a hard time on here, what with being described as odd and 'getting your kicks'. I can see that it is not a good idea to encourage indiscriminate staring at other people's privates but I think that is precisely what you're trying to avoid, isn't it?

It does sound like he may have a sexual interest going on. I think the suggestion to get him checked over for hormone levels etc is sensible. Your feeling that it is a bit odd is worth taking heed off - mums and dads know their kids best.

Alternatively, maybe he is just wondering whether all ladies' bits are the same from person to person.

Lastly - does your son have access to the telly in the morning before you get up? If so, is it at all possible that he could be looking at adult channels or those phone sex things that are on freeview? Just an idea.