5yo with fiddling fingers (biting nails, picking nose etc) - suggestions?

[NumptyMum]

DS is nearly 5; he seems to constantly need to do something with his fingers, picking his nose, biting his nails (fingers AND toenails), fiddling with his willy (in an absent minded way, not purposeful!). We remind him constantly not to do it, but I think he needs something else to replace the things that aren't socially acceptable. If he were a girl, he'd probably twirl/suck his hair - but it's not long enough.

So, any thoughts on what else we could suggest? I'm seriously considering worry beads, but suspect he'd suck them and I'm not sure how safe that would be when he's in bed in the evening...

Any thoughts/ideas very welcome, I hate having to constantly bicker at him for doing the other stuff...

I bit my nails right down until my late 20's. And sucked my thumb till about 10 (v occasionally still do it for comfort at age 59!) My mum threatened to paint my nails with bitter aloes, but didn't. She would say TYTOBA (pronounced tie-toe-bar!) when I was biting my nails or thumb sucking - take your thumb out, bitter aloes - but it didn't have much effect. I now pick my nails instead, they can get quite long sometimes if life is good :).

Perhaps you are just going to have to chill over this? But suggest gently that people don't play with their willies in public.

I have Aspergers, by the way, and think in my case it might have had something to do with it.

Thanks so much for your reply! I think the fact that DS is always needing to do SOMETHING with his hands (unless he's racing around) means I need to help him divert them elsewhere if possible; by 'picking nails' do you mean cleaning under them? That can be quite satisfying... Anyway, I'm probably going to make DS a bead bracelet just to see how that goes, possibly just to wear while watching TV to start with.

I do clean under my nails with my other nails, but by picking them I mean when they get reasonably long I kind of break the edges off by pressing them with another nail, and tear them neatly so they still look not too bad, only shorter

I am constantly touching my thumbs to each nail in turn, I think this could be Asperger's behaviour and helps my thinking process.

I sound like quite a case !

I do the same. As a child I bit my nails, chewed my hair, picked spots, and just generally fiddled with something all the time. My mum tried loads of things over the years but honestly nothing worked and I'm still bad. I'm less fidgety when I'm calm and typing on mn means my hands are busy! I wish I had an answer to it because it is socially very difficult for me and I can see DS is like it also.

A bracelet would be a good start and maybe make sure he always has something he can play with. Over the years I've had loads of different things - things with different textures are best, and things that can be squashed and chewed. Teethers might be good?

I don't have Aspergers btw.

Sorry for delayed response - just checked back in. Thanks for the additional info folks, I'll try the bracelet and perhaps also think of something that has different textures (perhaps for bedtime, though that might prove difficult if he gets to attached to it and has to go on school trips away, thinking a long way ahead into the future...........)

Cheers all!

I still have my beloved pandy (glove puppet)

I used to bite my nails and fiddle with everything especially when at school or when I needed to concentrate. I used to bite my nails until they bleed!! I stop following a sensory integration training I attended. Found out I was biting my nails and touching everything to help me to remain focus, calm and alert to engage in activities. I also use to rock.

Chewing toys (www.nationalautismresources.com/oral-motor.html)
and a various diet (mixture of crunchy and chewy foods) helps, as well as items which are alerting like fidget boxes - there is a good fidget box called digits fidgets on amazon (www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00E40WZKK) Also weighted blankets helped me.

I now have nails :)). Knowing when your child needs alerting helps too. Te products might help or you could have a full assessment by an OT but I would try the items first. Hope this helps