DS picks my mole for comfort. I need this to stop, but how?!

[LaTristesse]

He's 2 and he used to stroke this mole on my collarbone while he was breastfeeding. When we stopped feeding (7 months ago) he continued to want to 'touch mole' for comfort, which I kind of went along with as it calmed him down and made him feel secure.
But he's getting so vicious and picky with it now, despite almost constant reminders to be gentle, and some shouting from me and pushing his hand away when it really hurts.
I don't know what to do about this, sometimes it gets so sore, but I'm loathe to remove his comforter. Any ideas people?

When my DS2 used to be rough when feeding, I used to say 'too rough' and put him on the floor and stand up. No shouting or attention, but I removed myself. Not feeding now but I do exactly the same if he is rough/too wriggly when sitting on my knee. He then 'gets the message' for a good few weeks before trying again.

Smack his hand away and say in your firmest parent voice 'No'!

Sorted.

Then distract him with something nice to play with that doesn't actually hurt mummy or leave physical scars or cause a melanoma.

By 'too rough' I mean playing with other bits of me - wasn't always same part - sometimes hair, ear, other boob etc.

You need to get it removed, I'm sorry. IIRC, The more he aggravates it, the more likely it is to change and it's not worth the risk to your health. In the meantime, I'd put a plaster over it.

Don't smack him, that's no way to teach someone else to be gentle.

Is this really a big problem? Just tell him to pack it in, he's two, not under one.

I think you are setting yourself up for huge problems in the future if you can't stop a two year old from stroking your mole . What is wrong with the word 'no' - presumably you would use that word if he tried to touch a kettle or similar?

Agree with Ragwort

Also, this:
You need to get it removed, I'm sorry. IIRC, The more he aggravates it, the more likely it is to change and it's not worth the risk to your health. In the meantime, I'd put a plaster over it.

I guess the issue is the OP wants the child to be 'gentle' but doesn't want to stop it altogether - which I think is pretty confusing for a kid. So just saying no full stop will be easier.

It's a mole and, by the sound of it, it's in the perfect place for the sun. I'd just get it removed, then you won't have to worry about it turning cancerous.

Thanks all. Yes littlebluechair you're right, I would live him to be more gentle but don't really want him to stop, mainly because it'll be so upsetting for him. It'd feel like a betrayal taking his comfort thing away. But I know I need to, and i need some help in working out how to do that. Remember how attached you were to your favourite bear? It's the same thing, how do I take it away without crushing him? That's why I'd rather he just kept on but be gentle, but I understand at this age it's just confusing to sometimes be told no. Any ideas on replacing / removing a comforter basically?!

I'd put a plaster on it. That will make it a lot easier for your son to accept that mummy's neck hurts, we mustn't touch it, rather than him still seeing the mole and you just saying you don't want him tontouch any more
How about buy him a comforter toy and offer it when ever he asks to stroke your mole? With a combination of thd 2 I bet he gets over it pretty quickly :-)

The thing is, that he could potentially be damaging your health [over dramatic]

So say no, plaster it, get a GP appt.

You say it will be upsetting for him. How do you know, it might not be.

And at this age it will be no worse than dummy removal, a night or two of grumpiness, tops.

FGS... just say NO! ....I am with Ragwort

You are allowed to say that to children, and the earlier you start the better!

Just have it taken out if you can't/won't make him stop picking at your mole.

This is not the same as a favourite bear.
You have to make him stop since, as others have said, it can lead to health problems for you.
Buy him a bear or a blankie and get tough about this.

Good lord - you won't "crush him"!

I agree with SoupDragon- just say 'No' firmly and remove him!

(I would have the mole removed too)

Get him this and put a plaster over your mole.

OP, one of my sons (3) loves to reach out and touch a skintag on my collarbone, for comfort and as part of hugs ("I love the big one on your neck, mammy" ). I understand what you mean about not wanting to deny him. In my case, he is old enough to know how gentle he needs to be if he wants to touch it. A word of warning though, this skintag has become bigger in the last couple of months, so if yours is a mole, be careful and find out the implications.

shrinkingnora