unique 4 yr old son??

[peppajay]

I have a 4 yr old DS who is described by his pre school as 'quirky and different'. He is completely different from any other 4 yr old boy I know. He is very bright, has a great sense of humour and is always happy but he gets distressed extremely easily if routines are broken or he has to use a different toilet. He never out of choice plays with boys always girls and plays in the home corner or looks at books. His favourite past time is singing and dancing and he had a taster session at a dancing class with his 3 pre school friends (all girls) today which he loved. He hates his space being invaded and much prefers playing alone to playing with others altho he will play with others but at parties or big gatherings he will always choose to go off and find his own space to go off and play. He can be very aggressive to other children and this has been on ongoing problem since he was a baby and after working with pre school staff etc we put this down to him attacking others when he feels his space is being invaded we often ask him why he does it and now he is older he can explain and says 'they were in my way' or 'i didn't want him there'. He is always disiplined when he does get aggressive but nothing works and he gets so worked up because so and so was in his way!!!! I constanty have to follow him around at the park etc as he can be so nasty and we leave park/soft play instantly but he doesnt mind as he then says he can play on his own. He has 4 friends at pre school who he plays really well with but doesnt really play with anyone other than these 4 girls, and they don't really see the agression side at pre school because there is loads of space for him to play in, as the premises is huge.

He is starting school in sept and 6 from his pre school will be in his class 3 of them boys and 2 girls he doesnt have anything to do with either of these children but isnt the slightest bit bothered. But I was listening to some of the boys at pre school today and they were chatting about nerf guns, dr who and darleks my DS has never heard of any of these things!! He plays and talks about buses, taking his teddy shopping and just sings and dances all day!! I am just worried when he starts school he is going to stand out like a sore thumb for being different. On a day to day basis he is so easy to parent as he is so compliant, happy and energetic but he just isnt like his peers. Most of my friends have girls and the ones that do have boys have girls as well so he always plays with the girls!!

Does anyone else have a son like this or is he really unique?

Well I hope he is unique. Who wants a clone? He sounds quirky, which is great. He will probably find other children in his class who are more like him. Nerf guns at age 4 is a bit . My DSs didn't get interested in those until well into junior school, and were definitely obsessed with buses and teddies at pre-school. In fact they spent half their pre-school years romping round in fairy tutus with ballerina dolls. Not that I'd remind them now that they are usually covered in mud from the rugby field.

Don't worry about him. It's important that he's happy and doesn't feel undue pressure to conform (he'll get some, probably but it's no bad thing to learn early on to stand up to unnecessary pressure to join the herd.) My DS1 wasn't popular for several years because he was quirky. He didn't care at all and in the end, neither did anyone else, and he now has as many friends in his class as any other boy.

One boy in DS2's class spends 100% of his time playing with the girls and always has done. He is well liked among the boys and very quirky and witty but he just prefers female company.

My DDs knew a boy like this. He is unique and just listens to a different drummer and not one of the herd.
I like him.

I think every parent would say their child is unique. And they all are.

I think the school structure will help with the socialisation - he'll have no option but to work/play in groups, and the staff will be used to dealing with children who struggle with this.