Do babys of 15 months understand "NO" .........Help???

[Dreams]

Hi my son is 15 months old.....I adore him hes my first child and spoilt rotten. he is now 15 months old and understands alot of things like ...dummy, bot bot, nite nites etc etc but when it comes to "NO" i believe he just chooses not to listen. He was such a wonderful quiet well behaved perfect baby but now as much as i love and adore him hes turned into a little terror! he has this thing where he likes to hit and head butt! i tell him NO and he laughs and does it again. this just goes on and on until i have to shout at him (which i hate doing but he wont listen to me)has anyone else had any experience like this and how do you deal with it ? will he ever listen to me or is he just to young?

Hi Dreams! We used to have a similar thing with my ds who's now 2. He used to hit and bite and I used to tell him NO but it seemed to make it even worse and it certainly didn't stop him. I was then advised to just ignore him (which is hard, I know, when he's hurting you). I would try not to say anything, put him down straight away and just turn my back on him and give him no attention whatsoever for a few minutes. This definitely worked although it was hard not to react at first. Try it for a day or so and see if you get anywhere - best of luck. Let me know how you go on.

he most certainly does understand the meaning of No and he is pushing your boundaries (which is something they never stop doing). Think of it like a puppy needing the authority of the top dog. Just say 'no, don't do that please' and put him down or extract yourself from him physically and pretend to be getting on with something else that doesn't involve him.

I sound like I've really got it sussed don't I? In fact I had to learn the hard way just like everyone else and need massive support sessions form DH when I do finally show DS1 who's boss. It isn't easy but has to be done. They actually genuinely like to know how far they can go, it makes them feel secure

Good luck

dreams - he thinks it's a game. If I tell ds2 to not do somthing he does it all the more. if I ask him to come and get in the car he runs away but if I say "oh ok then bye bye" he comes running to me. Trick him!

A lot of Speech and language therapists recommend using positive language - for example if you say "don't touch" to a 15 month old- he will hear and process "touch". Save "no" for a really naughty word, and use phrases like "come away" at other times. At 15 months distraction often works better than a no.

I had to introduce this for my autistic ds1, but it works really well with his NT younger brother (2 in Jan).

Dreams, I agree with auntymabel. Basically your 'no' is a form of attention and he's certainly getting it as he's driving you nuts! I just read a book called (stupidly I think) 'Toddler Taming' and he has all sorts of really sensible advice about how to deal with the attention seeking behaviour of toddlers (which is of course totally normal and in fact rather healthy). The main advice is to give no attention to behaviour you don't like at all. Even a 'no' or being told off is a form of attention and so the little terrors carry on doing what you don't want them to. The theory is that they get bored of it if it gets no reaction from you whatsoever. Good luck!

Evita
I wish my friend would read this, I really do. her DS is allegedly best friends with mine (both2.7) But her's wallops mine with what ever is to hand - a toy Scoop last time- around the head. He does it without warning nor theusual snatching-type to change the dynamic of the situation. She hauls him off for a dressing down then he is marched back in and made to say 'sorry' upon which he is told he is a good boy for saying sorry and my DSis expected to say 'that's OK'.
Well two weeks ago my ds decided he had had enough and refused to go and play with him, three cheers I say,. It is a shame as they used to see each other daily.
My friend is wondering what is up but I just can't tell her the real reason - the kid is doing it to get her attention, even negative attention. I don't want to critisice her mummying skills as she has rather a lot on her plate.

The point I'm trying to make is that we have to show our kids where to draw the line or they endup being the type of brat no one else wants to play with.

If he's looking for attention, IMHO the last thing you should do is say "No!" in the typical way that we all do. I think he would just interpret this as attention. Jimjams has a good point too, that young children can't process lots of words and may just pick up the last one or the loudest or most emphasised one. You could ignore which is hard but at the same time you could redirect, e.g. not give attention to the behaviour but continue on getting him to do something else while giving your own running commentary....

I tried a 'bored' mommy strategy today and it worked a treat! We've got 1 cupboard which no lock will fit and it has some things in I really don't want my daughter to get and I can't put them anywhere else due to their size and shape. Of course, this cupboard is her favourite. So today when she went to it, instead of my usual 'no' and leading her away by the hand I yawned and said 'oh, not that again' yawned and walked away. She closed the door and followed me. Yay!!

Brilliant idea Evita! I sometimes find that making a joke of things works if its something they DON'T want to do, e.g. nail cutting etc. It certainly makes me more able to handle it anyway....

Hi everyone thanks for all your replys i am going to try some of your tecniques to see if it works with him ......I can understand what you are all saying and am .......Totally praying it will work.Suzywong i can understand about your friends toddler as mine went through the stage of hitting anyone with objects he thought it was funny but i soon stopped that one ....... It did make me feel quite embarased at times and upset at the same time as i kept blaming myself thinking why does he do this ? what have i done to make him want to hit everyone ie: my sisters little girl is 8 and she used to come and see him and say hello and he used to greet her with a slap in the face.....thank god he does not do it now i tried the saying NO but it did not work so i tried STOP THAT NOW with a little rase of the voice and it seemed to work.
Thanks again for all your support and suggestions I am going to start it tomorrow by ignoring him when he does something naughty and walk away cause mostly all of the time he follows me round the house anyway.
I will keep you all updated.