How do I stop an 11 year old biting her nails - tried everything I can think of!

[Cezzy]

My daughter is just 11. She has bitten her nails for the past couple of years. We have tried everything we can to stop her - the bitter paint on stuff (didn't work - she got used to it), rewards for not biting her nails, telling her how sore they can get, warning her of infections if she bites too low etc but nothing helps. She often does it without realising. I was wondering if she could have some form of false nail extension during the school holidays so that when she goes to bite them she won't and if they are on for the 6 weeks that may be long enough to give her a good start on breaking the habit. Does anyone know if this is a suitable treatment for someone her age - I worry in case they damage the nail bed as I don't know much about false nail techniques, I know they are more advanced than they used to be. Any advice or help would be appreciated, thanks.

I don't have a DD who bites their nails, but DS1 has bitten his nails for years.....like you we tried everything to try and get him to stop....but nothing worked. In the end we just let him get on with it - he will stop when he's ready. As for the false nail extensions, I know that when i had mine taken off, my natural nails were absolutely ruined, and it took months and months for them to repair. :)

When DD2 was 10, she was invited to a "pamper party" by one of her best friends.

That gave her the impetus to stop.

Maybe you could book a home manicure for her, with a couple of friends in a week or two, and see if it works for her?

I'd try having nail varnish on, making sure that the ends of her nails are sealed so that theres no niggly bits to want to bite. Change regularly so that it stays really nice, and it might just give her enough pause to not bite.

Thanks for the advice, its her birthday soon - she is not really a girly girl so a whole pamper party may be a bit much for her, but maybe just a nice manicure and hand massage may be fun (wouldn't mind one myself too!). We've tried varnish, I have lots of funky colours but will try again in the holidays.

Talking from personal experience when a teenager, don't do nail extentions - sticky pads are annoying and nail glue will take off the top layer of the nail making it weaker. I was never a girly girl, but I did like to paint my nails mad colours or glittery - let her choose a couple and see how it goes.

For the record, I didn't stop biting my nails until I was 25...

I'm a nail biter who is currently not biting her nails - I'm 38yr . It is an anxiety related habit for the most part so worth exploring what's niggling (I tend not to bite at all on holiday!), all the techniques you've described never worked for me either! I genuinely don't know i'm doing it and i get upset when people try to stop me or bat my fingers away from my mouth. What does work is getting nail gels. This is essentially a gel that is painted on and sealed with a uv lamp. It is not an extension, but it is hard enough for me to become conscious that I'm chewing/biting. It doesn't damage the nail bed, and the nail will grow underneath. You can get clear gel for a young girl, it's not thick so noone would notice. The one I've had is Biogel. If my nails get bad then I have this for a couple of months, get 'on the wagon' and let my nails recover.
Ultimately, is she's not bothered by it, she won't be bothered to stop. No carrot or stick did it for me until I got my high faluting job and I don't want to be seen gnawing my knuckles in front of the board!

I was/still am a nail biter at 31. I have been able to stop when I want from about 15 and nail varnish to make them pretty helped when I was a teenager. What really helped bizarrely was my lovely Grandma from an early age saying "oh Charlie, you want to have lovely nails on your wedding day" whenever they looked awful I'd hear that in my head.

I still bite occasionally when stressed but most of the time they look nice.

I'd say just keep encouraging her to stop and not want to bite right down. Encourage her to file them short as when one of mine breaks I bite them all.

Thanks, may look into the gel polish - we are going on holiday so she can have them a nice colour for that. The wedding day won't work as currently she says she is never getting married as boys are stupid! Maybe when she's older... Thanks for the advice about extensions, I did worry and now think these are best avoided. She also picks her toenails and has had problems with these becoming inflamed and we have had to see a chiropodist which she hates, but this has not deterred her, hence we are keen to stop before she gets more problems. We have spoken to her but she denies anything is worrying her, but I may get auntie to talk as they sometimes talk more to those not so close, but I think where it may have started as an anxiety thing it has now become habit.

You don't say if she wants to stop or not?
My mother was obsessed about me biting my nails at that age and we went through the same dance of manicures, painting, bribery etc. Didn't work. I quite enjoyed doing it and was a tomboy too so manicures wasted on me! I have mostly stopped now, three decades later. So long as she is not biting them to the quick ie ragged, bleeding, painful etc then I would just relax about it TBH. Only difference is if she wants to stop. In that case you could try filing them right down but she might gnaw at what is left...

She says she wants to stop as she gets embarrassed by her nails and they do get sore at times, especially when the skin gets chapped around them. We don't go on about it as that would make her more anxious, just wanted some ideas to try that I may not have considered.

I stopped biting my nails at 17, it was acrylic nails that helped me, they are not brilliant for the nail but they do provide a pretty tough barrier to get through and it helped me because I simply couldn't do it so the urge eventually passed. I still pick and sometimes have a nibble 10 years on but by and large my nails are fine and I am really glad i had the acrylics that did stop me.

I have had the gel ones and they are really good as well, I have Jessica geleration ones but I think they are all the same - biogel, gelish, Shellac and cal-gel.

Regarding the anxiety it is really small stuff that gets me chewing - being late for something and sitting in traffic, not big 'identifiable' issues but minor niggles. That's why it might be hard for her to come up with something.... It might be worth asking if this feels familiar so she can work out when she's 'chewy'!

I'm a nail biter - I'm not on the nails at the moment, but the moment I get a bit stressed I start gnawing. And I'm 39.

I was desperate to stop at 9, at 11, at 19.... well, you get the idea. I've just never really managed it.

You can try rewards (it worked for my DD), but as a dedicated nail biter, I'd say that the short term satisfaction of yanking nails off with your teeth outweighs all the long term negatives.

I bit my nails as a child and teenager. My mum tried everything - from the bitter paint to painting them with nail varnish to rewards. None of it worked.

But what did work was getting fake acrylic nails. I just couldn't bite them like I bit my nails and I really liked the way they looked. I had them done a couple of times and then just grew my nails.

I still occasionally nibble them if things are going bad but even then I stop pretty quick.

I would try getting her an alternate thing to chew on like like a chewy or and coil braclet