Sleep - help!

[TandB]

DS2 (6 months) is hugely inconsistent in his sleeping habits. He has been capable on the face of it of sleeping through from a few weeks old, but there were a series of things that stopped him doing it - feeding problems, bronchiolitis, a lengthy stomach upset etc, so he switches between sleeping consistently 7.30 through to 5.30 and going back to sleep till 7 after a feed, to waking anything up to 4 times a night to feed. Now he does this fairly regularly even if there doesn't appear to be anything wrong.

We have been on holiday for the last 2 weeks (in the UK so no time zone issues) and he started sleeping through again on day 2 - occasionally waking for a sip of water or to have his dummy replaced, but not feeding or staying awake. In the second week he once again reverted to waking 3 times a night for food (literally overnight change as usual - one night sleeping 10 hours, the next night waking ever 2 or 3) and also not wanting to go back to sleep after about 5am.

I know I can get him back to sleep but it will take about an hour of effort, but after a couple of nights this will probably break the waking pattern and he will (barring illness etc) go back to sleeping through. DP thinks this is terribly mean and that it is me trying to enforce some GF-type routine. I should say that we have never been remotely routine based - both DSs have been fed on demand, nap when they are tired, in a sling if necessary etc.

DP keeps getting up with him when he wakes at 5am and saying "you get some more sleep" which is obviously very well-intentioned and kind, but it is getting very difficult to keep saying to him "I don't want more sleep right now, I want the baby to NOT get into a pattern of getting up at 5am" because when the holiday is over I will be on my own with 2 kids Tuesday to Friday (he works in London), one of whom is waking 3 times a night and is hell-bent on getting up at 5am. I would rather he just stuck his head under the pillow and let me get on with settling DS down. I can't seem to get him to understand that some babies need a bit more work at getting them to sleep - DS1 started sleeping through at 7 weeks and never stopped, so as far as DP is concerned, if DS2 isn't doing that then it is something we are doing wrong.

What I actually think is going on is that DS2 is a determined little bugger and we need to adopt a completely different approach.

So any ideas on how to stop the constant sleep regressions? And how to get DP on board with persisting with an approach?

Umm. Babies often get up at 5am - presumably his morning nap is at about 9am? Both mine did and do - you just go to bed earlier.

And at 6 months I'd be astonished if he was sleeping through all the time. Most babies are waking up for night feeds into their tenth month - it sounds as though you were extremely lucky with your first and your second is more average! It doesn't mean anything is 'wrong' if they go back to waking for night feeds, it just means they're hungrier for the moment. Babies grow in fits and starts and when they're growing they need more calories.

I completely disagree, Zuleika. But then I am one of those evil routine mums. However, my daughter slept through consistently from about 8 weeks and has slept 7-7 from about 7 months (she had a dream feed until then at 11). Your baby has clearly shown that he is capable of sleeping through the night, so I would just leave him if he wakes up or give him some water and settle him back to sleep using whichever method you use. But if you get used to having a meal late at night (for example), you'll keep wanting that meal, regardless of whether you actually need it or not.
My daughter wakes up occasionally at 6, but unless she is really upset, is left in her cot until 7. Most of the time she just lies there gurgling and playing with her taggies and is perfectly happy until we come to get her and occasionally she doses back off for a bit. I think it's a great skill to teach them for when they are a toddler and can get out if bed. They can then grab a book and entertain themselves for a bit if they wake up early.

The great misconception about GF is that you leave your baby to cry it out for hours on end. You don't, and nowhere in the book does it say that. You leave them for a minute or so at a time and gradually increase the interval. We never did more than 5 mins and very soon it wasn't necessary.

Good luck

It's completely untrue that once babies get used to having a meal late at night they will go on wanting it forever (also, Lala, if you never fed yours at night, how on earth would you know??). Both mine - and all the other babies I know - tailed off their overnight needs once solids kicked in.

Zuleika, of course I fed her at night! I didnt expect her to sleep through from birth! She was fed twice a night (after dream feed) initially, then once, then not at all once she showed that she is capable of sleeping through the night.