DS kicking, pulling my hair, punching and slapping me...

[Happylander]

I have just come back from a camping holiday where my DS (2.8) was increasingly violent to me when I asked him to not do things/do things. He is very strong and at one point I couldn't get away from him because we were in sleeping compartment of pod and he pulled a chunk of my hair out and was biting me repeatedly until I got out and zipped him up in it. I would have had to literally throw him off me to get him away but felt that would be too excessive. I don't know what to do as I have tried naughty step, removing toys, ignoring but it doesn't make any difference I even, in desperation, called my ex up to have a word with him as I am exhausted by it all and just felt like crying. DS has never seen any violence or watched violent programmes and so I don't understand it and it is so so upsetting.

Any help? I am feeling like such a failure as a parent

Ds1 went through a similar phase. It's awful isn't it, you wonder what kind of man he'll become I employed a firm "NO!" and put him in time out. Is your ds still in a cot? You could put him there if he won't stay in time out. It's harder to deal with while you're out though, maybe buggy or carseat? They grow out of it eventually : )

I do a firm no and have done time outs they did not really work although he did stay in the area I put him in where ever we were so moved onto removing toys. I stopped using a buggy and he walks every where but he would be a nightmare to get back into a buggy or car seat anyway as he would just hit me. I had to move car seat to back of car as he started to kick me while driving along which was dangerous. I just feel that I must be doing something wrong for him to be so violent towards me.

Sorry the grammar in that is appalling!!

Ds1 went through a similar phase. It's awful isn't it, you wonder what kind of man he'll become I employed a firm "NO!" and put him in time out. Is your ds still in a cot? You could put him there if he won't stay in time out. It's harder to deal with while you're out though, maybe buggy or carseat? They grow out of it eventually : )

Phone issues, sorry!!

What I meant to say was, lots of children this age go through phases of doing unpleasant things, hitting, biting, poo smearing, tantrums, refusing to eat, refusing to wear clothes, they don't call them the terrible twos for nothing!! It is rarely a reflection on the parents, more an indication that the child is developing as he should. However, he needs to know it's not ok to hit people, so I would persevere with the no and the time out. Is he more prone to hitting at certain times, like when he is hungry or tired or bored? You could try distracting him with a toy or an activity, or food if possible low blood sugar makes it worse. Maybe reinforcing positive behaviour too, eg "Aren't you playing nicely, what a good boy" or "Mummy needs you to be a really big boy now and [insert whatever usually sets him off]. Have you talked to your hv? They see this kind of thing all the time and may well have some other suggestions. It's not going to happen instantly though, so the road ahead may be bumpy! Fwiw, DS1 is 6.9 and he's lovely now, he hasn't hit me for years :)

He is much worse when he is tired and that is why he was much worse on holiday but it was extreme! I do try good reinforcement but some days it is constant battles over everything. Today however, he has been an angel and even washed his cup, plate and cutlery up when all I did was ask him to take his cup into kitchen LOL.

I haven't seen my HV since last year so haven't asked her. Glad your son is not hitting you anymore