8 year old behaviour

[Shaz2011]

Hi all I have special guardianship for my nephew who is 8, he has been with us since he was 6 but for the last year his behaviour has become a problem for me & my own dc he has tried to strangle ds1 on 2 occassions, he has shouted aggressively to my ds2 who is 1 he has been physical with me to the extent he has punched & kicked me he has damanged our property & dc belongings am at my wits end with it he never used to be like this he was a sweet kind gental boy & now he is not please help any suggestions will be welcomed

I think this is well beyond the experience of most Mners Shaz. you don't say why he is with you but it sounds like he is having trouble adjusting to his new situation and maybe dealing with what has gone on before. Just wondered what help he and you are both getting?

I think this is well beyond the experience of most Mners Shaz. you don't say why he is with you but it sounds like he is having trouble adjusting to his new situation and maybe dealing with what has gone on before. Just wondered what help he and you are both getting?

What is he like at school? Could you get help from via the SEN teacher and the nurse attached to the school? They may offer family counselling.

His mum ( my sister) couldn't look after him so he went to his granparents but they are too old now so me & my dh took him on he has been with us for over 2 years now but its only been the last year that he has been acting like this we don't get any help from social services but his school has got a councellor to see him even tho he is good in school

Not beyond my experience, I have to say.

Both my db and my dd displayed this kind of behaviour, though fortunately mainly aimed at people bigger and stronger than themselves. I was having to restrain dd at this age. In both cases, there was trauma at the back of the situation (adoption in one case, disability in the other). A friend of ds' reacted in a similar way to his mother's terminal illness.

It is not at all rare for a trauma (like being rejected twice, which it seems he has) to work to the surface and start displaying itself at a later age; db was still working out the stress of his early years at the age of 10.

I'd go to your GP and ask for a CAHMS referral; they may be able to teach him strategies for dealing with his feelings.

It could be that he's displaying some sort of attachment disorder/difficulties. Worth googling for strategies to use and its very common in fostered, adopted etc children. Maybe pop over to the special needs kids board and ask their advice but I would second going along to your GP as this poor boy o viously needs some help

Thankyou cory what is Cahms?

childrens and adolescent mental health team

services even!!!

That don't sound that good what does it intail

Don't worry shaz they deal with a wide range of children. My dd is on the waiting list to see them for some cognitive behaviour therapy and some social skills work as she has ADHD. They deal with all sorts in children from depression, behaviour issues, ADHD, to diagnosing autism, working with children who have issues after being adopted or are in care. Nothing to worry about ;)

Ok thankyou I will see what happens tuesday as I am seeing his school councellor & than will go from there