Anyone with a child who,hardly eats?

[tazmo]

Hi anyone got a child who hardly eats? She is 26 months and is driving me potty. I never know what to feed her. She drinks far too much milk. She used to be on the 75th centime when born and is now on the 25 th. she is developing normally but just wonder if we will get out of this stalemate of limited food intake. She has another hospital appt but there does not appear to be anything physically wrong. She only really eats carbs - bread, cereal, chips. Occasionally a turkey or,chicken nugget - but the rest of the time it is milk or Ella's kitchen 4 month old smoothies. Help!

Time to get into Firm Mother mode tazmo

Don't offer her milk she doesn't need it all day after two, as long as she has (for example) a yoghurt, inch size cube of cheese or a good portion of broccoli a day. A good glug at bedtime is enough.

Make her a meal of veggies, protein & starch & don't offer anything else if she refuses or tantrums. Shepherds pie, fish pie, pasta bake, simple tasty meals.

If you don't get strict with her now she will develop bad habits.
YOU are in charge- talk to your HV if you need advice, she'll have seen it all before!

lots of good ideas here

You need to be very careful not to turn this into a battle of wills. You can guarantee you won't win.

Remember that hunger makes food taste better so try to offer her food only when it's a while since she had milk.

Don't ever try to persuade her to eat. Make food available then make it clear you are not bothered whether she eats it or not. Let her see you eating and really enjoying it but don't offer her yours. If she ever sneaks anything off your plate pretend to be shocked and make a game of it.

Try to cut down on milk in the mornings so she is more ready to eat during the day but doesn't go to bed hungry.

Most important of all stop worrying about it. Lots of children have very restricted diets at this age and they get over it. The diet she's getting is probably meeting all her needs but you can get this confirmed by seeing a dietician. That reassurance may help you to feel under less pressure and which will in turn help her to be more relaxed about new foods.

Completely disagree with advice above.

Some children can have food aversions that can be made much worse by paying too much attention to them. Don't make meal times a battleground.
Cut back or dilute the milk. Offer small amounts of all food groups but make no fuss if it's not eaten after 30 minutes and remove the food.
Give vitamin and iron supplements if dietis lacking.

The most important thing is keep mealtimes relaxed and keep offering all food groups. It is a phase and will pass eventually.

I have two children who are fabulous eaters and one terrible one! My best mate is a Dr specialising in behavioural problems in children. She has been brilliant in reassuring me that I'm not doing anything wrong and some children just have food issues when young. The idea is to not make these issues worse. Many children thrive on quite limited diets.

Good luck.

Disagree with bossybritches not the advice above.

I have one fussy eater and on bottomless pitt. Some kids are fussier than others. At this stage I just focus on food exposure and never bother forcing anymore. Instead try to keep meals social and keep exposing your child to child friendly foods (not overly seasoned). For example today we had roast chicken, mash and peas. The fussy eater didn't eat at meal time, but sat with us at the table (now 4). He said the chiken was yuck, but 30 mins later he ate his chicken and mash. So less fighting gets better results.

I do agree that if you are trying to get kids to eat solids, then you need to cut down on milk, especially for the two hours before your main meal.

Your child has lots of time to build up their appetite, I wouldn't worry, just keep to a consistent meal time and meal habits. I also found with my fussier eater he enjoys having more time to get to terms with eating, he eats better if we sit around the table for ages (pretty annoying as I sometimes just feel like getting the meal over with, he is clearly a fan of meditteranian style eating!).

my daughter eats exactly the same chips, toast ect and at times i worry. some days she eats a lot more than others but i think some people/kids have smaller appetites thasn others and if you make an issue out of it it just causes stress and upset.

I'm currently having a similar issue with my 18mo DS. He used to eat everything put in front of him but for the last month or so meals have become increasingly frustrating. The only thing I can guarantee he will eat (aside from dessert and fruit smoothies) is fish fingers!

I'm getting as much different fruit into him as possible so I know he has had at least some goodness every day but the constant throwing away of food without it even being tasted is getting me down - and this is stuff which I know he likes and would have wolfed down a few weeks ago. It doesn't seem to affect his high energy levels so I'm just hoping it's a phase and a short-lived one. I've also bought a large mat to put under his high chair to catch all the jettisoned food. DS only has 14oz milk per day but I'm thinking about cutting down to see if it makes a difference as he eats cheese and yoghurt during the day anyway.

ilovedainty nuts but I agree with you! Sorry if it came across otherwise not sure which bit of my post you were referring to?

Not making a fuss or getting into a battle of wills is important, OP sounded to me like she was offering all sorts & then milk as a last resort which is bound to fill a child up & take the edge of their hunger so they won't eat.

Firm no fuss boundaries at meal times with lots of social chit chat from an early age, making meals into a social enjoyable occasion is so important.

The best advice I had when mine were little was from a paediatric nutritionist who said that she'd only once ever known a child truly starve themselves. She advised looking at the childs diet as a whole over the week. If they have a day of eating less well, ( off colour parties, busy on holiday/socialising) then just try & have a few days with extra fruit/veg healthy stuff, it evens out nutritionally.

Occasional Fish & Chips if freshly cooked is one of the most complete meals you can get, add in a portion of peas & a glass of milk or juice & you tick all the boxes!

Ooooh here we go!
OP I had this problem with DS since weaning stage and I am fighting a loosing battle with the 'eat or starve' brigade.....
Some interesting advice and support here but here are lots of threads about this on MN.