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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD wants me. Only me and all of me all the bloody time

14 replies

Cbell · 22/06/2012 19:47

So DD (18 months) wants me all the time. If I'm cooking she hangs onto my legs crying. When my Dh gets home she bats him away.

When will this get better?

OP posts:

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hoodoo12345 · 22/06/2012 19:52

My DD at the same age would scream if i went to the toilet, and if people spoke to her in supermarkets or lifts!
I look at her now as a confident,outgoing and independant 11 year old and i wonder where those years went.

ButtonBoo · 22/06/2012 19:52

Oh good god!! My DD is 8mo and has just started the whole sep. anxiety thing. I thought it'd stop soon but if I have to wait til 18mo's I think I'll have a breakdown!!!

Gauchita · 22/06/2012 19:57

In my experience it did DD used to be like this; DH wouldn't exist after 5pm, she would wail if I wasn't with her at bedtime. And only me, DH couldn't be in the room! We were worried as DS was coming soon so we very gently started bringing DH in the room for a few minutes, etc. Long story short, and 9m later, she's completely over it. DH even has to read a few books every night at bedtime, I can't, it's not the same apparently

She even said 'mummy I'm daddy's best friend, you're DS' best friend', which stung but I'm doing my best to ignore

Gauchita · 22/06/2012 19:58

Sorry, forgot to say she just turned 3 and it's been better since she was around 2.2-2.3.

slatternlymother · 22/06/2012 20:02

DS does it in stages with me. He is 1.9 atm and we dealt with it by enforcing Daddy only time. So DH did bath and bed every night and I went out to the gym, supermarket and let them get on with it. It worked really well, although DS still chooses me for cuddles when he's sad. But that's what mummies do, isn't it?

Beamur · 22/06/2012 20:07

DD is still a bit like this..(she's 5)
It's sometimes hard work being the favourite!

Declutterbug · 22/06/2012 20:10

It's normal at this age (for some children), but bloody hard work. When it gets better depends on the child. One of mine was super super clingy at 18 months. At nearly 5 they were a different child, and it got far far less trying a long long time before that. Honestly by the age of 2 they were totally adorable and skipped the terrible twos phase . Shame about the argumentative threes...

Woodlands · 22/06/2012 20:16

Sounds familiar - my 23 month old has been like this for about three months. I heard that separation anxiety peaked between 8 and 18 months but it hit later here - I thought we'd escaped! It is wearing, and DH finds it hard to deal with. AM hoping it passes soon.

knittynoodle · 23/06/2012 00:19

Mine is like this - or was. I just let him spend more time alone with daddy and it seemed to ease it. I couldn't even do a poo without him busting the bathroom door down!

mummmsy · 23/06/2012 00:22

i remember this - mine was like this all of the time. Then she became a 'daddy's girl' and now she is 6 she's like her own person and never wants her mummy!!!

i remember how suffocating it can be though. and i'm sorry i can't remember ages as to when it gets better....it will though!

WorrisomeHeart · 23/06/2012 07:00

Glad to read that this will (hopefully!) stop soon!! 19mth old DS is just like this and is currently battering down the bedroom door while I try to have a lie in!

Original poster

Cbell · 23/06/2012 08:46

Maybe we should start a support thread: Parents who Can't Pee Alone!

This morning she refused to say hello to daddy - incase that means relinquishing her firm grasp on me. Insisted on sitting on my lap while I peed and pushed her toy train over my legs while I tried to shave them.

I'm alone with her this morning but this doesn't stop the shouting if I try to do anything without her. Help

OP posts:

mummmsy · 23/06/2012 09:57

oh yeah and as for housework/work/personal grooming - somethings got to give, so pick something to give/delegate and don't feel guilty about it. it won't be forever

AblativeAbsolute · 24/06/2012 21:13

DS1 was like this from 8 months to two and a half, and it was a bloody long two years. Sometimes he would literally scream until he was sick if I wasn't there for a few minutes. At nearly five he's now still quite a high maintenance sensitive soul, but it's nothing like it was - he's very happy with extended family or at pre-school, and it's only new people that he's still very nervous with. Personally, I would say push it as much as you need to, but no more - if they're that clingy, it can be quite traumatic for them to be left without you. We insisted that Daddy did bedtime almost all the time (because I just had to be able to go out occasionally without worrying too much), but otherwise I pretty much went with it. It's tough, though - I sympathise.

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