encouraging independence, emotional well being and stress

[OTTMummA]

Hi, just wanted some advice really, having a few problems with DS who is 4.6yrs old.

First i should say that there are 3 major things happening in the next 3/4 months, at the end of June we are moving, July we are having our second child, and in September he is starting primary school.

Now, i have been expecting some changes in his behaviour, i mean with all these things happening soon, i am suprised we only have this one real issue that has crept up, but i really want to sort it out, or have a plan in place if things get worse etc, i worry too much probably, but i want him to have a good three months before school so he is set up to be in a positive mind frame.

We had his parents evening last week and he is on stage 3 and 4's so has done really well, and we (dh and i) are confident that he has no problem with reading and writing and that he gets on well with the other children.

What has been happening lately though, is he has started to say he can't brush his teeth as he doesn't know how to, despite the fact that he has been doing it on his own for a long time now, he also has started to panic if he gets his head stuck whilst trying to get dressed and now refuses or cries if we do not put on his tops.
We are trying to be really positive with him, giving him praise for every little thing, even taking his plate into the kitchen after dinner etc
We tried again this morning to get himself dressed with no help ( because he can do it ) but it ended up in tears, and also gave him his tooth brush and told him that he didn't have to do it perfectly, just try and get what he could done etc, but that also ended up in tears, he wouldn't even try.

I am starting to get anxious about his emotional wellbeing as i was an awkward child who didn't make friends easily, and still don't tbh, i just like my own company, but i don't want this for DS, he is sociable, and i would like his transistion to primary school to go well, i don't want him to be the child who can't/won't change by himself at P.E etc.
None of his Nursery friends are going to his new school either which made me feel really sad for him.

Any tips or advice would be great, dh and i are going to have a discussion tonight about what we can do, or think a way around it.

TIA x

Sounds to me like your DS is going through a little regression phase. There are big changes coming along (new school, new siblbing) and some children react to this by wanting to be baby again...I mean we as adults sometimes react in an infantile way when we are afraid or stressed so a child is prefectly entitled to want/ need extra affection and attention. I'd try and give him loads of encouragement, try and tackle his fears. Reassure him you'll be there for him and that he will have a best friend in his sibbling, how great making new friends atthe new school will be etc.... CHange is daunting for all of us, especially for children.