Share your routine with me

[Newtothisstuff]

DD2 is 5 weeks old, DD1 was an absolute nightmare when it came to feeding, sleeping, self soothing etc (until she was around 3), I'm absolutely determined not to have another one like her because it was my fault with the whole pfb thing. I've been reading the baby whisperer book and wondered what kind of routines you had for your babies and if I'm just giving myself a hard time because she's not following anything yet ???

I've only got one DD so less experience than you but I followed the baby whisperer book and found it really helpful. My DD, now 5mo fell naturally into the EASY cycle (well the EAS anyway ) so I followed that and didn't worry about doing the same thing at the same time, just in the same order. It took her until about 13 weeks to be happy on her own (ie not being cuddled) and at that time I started putting her in her cot for daytime naps. She self-settled then (asleep within 10 minutes) and I usually put her down awake but tired in the evening. I go in every 5 minutes and if she is still very cross or upset after 10 or 15 mins I get her up and we try again about half an hour later. She goes straight back to sleep after each night feed so settles well then. I was worried about the constant cuddling for the first 3 months and continued lack of clock watching but it hasn't done any harm. I hope that helps.

At that age, they fed when they wanted, slept when they wanted and spent the rest of their time in a sling.

Eventually I started a bath, boob, bed routine at 9ish, slowly bringing it forward to 7ish and the day times fell into place on their own.

Ds1 slept 12 hours a night from 16 weeks. Ds2 didn't sleep through until 14 months.

Nevr had a routine other than the bath, feed in darkened room at 7pm every night. Other than thet, day time feeds and naps just happen whenever they needed it. DS1 is now 4 yrs old and has slept through 12 hours a night since 10 weeks. DS2 is nearl 6 months and has slept through since 16 weeks.

We roughly followed the EASY routine and it worked really well for us - so well that its only now at 5mo that DD is starting to grow out of the routine we started at about 6w!

EASY is very easy (yes, I know ) to follow as it isn't time restrictive. We fed roughly 3 hourly, followed by playtime and then a nap. The playtime just gradually lengthened as DD got older. However naps were wherever and however DD would take them, as she is not a great napper - so pushchair, on me, maybe one a day put down in her cot.

Our routine is generally about this:

Wakes up whenever she wants to really, but is roughly between 7-8
8am - bottle
11am - bottle
2pm - bottle
4.30pm - bottle
7pm - 1st half of bedtime bottle
7.30pm - bath or massage or story
7.45pm - rest of bottle, in the bedroom, with the light dimmed
11pm - dreamfeed

She self-settles happily, even for daytime naps (the only issue with cot naps is that she wakes up after 30 mins and can't go back to sleep) and sleeps at night from 8 until about 5 (though at 5mo she now starting to get a little more unsettled and sometimes wake as early as 3) and then goes off again for another 2 hours or so.

Routines aren't for everyone, but if you are interested in trying I'd recommend EASY or the Supernanny routine, which is very similar. For naps just start watching for the tired cues and put them down then, that might work better than instilling specific nap times at her age. Personally I'm a fan as it made me feel confident that DD had eaten enough and had the right amount of naps to happily go to sleep at night.

Thanks I'm going to give it a go.. Im just finding it difficult for her to feed then stay awake, she tends to fall asleep as soon as I've winded her

Will she do a routine the other way around? Maybe her natural routine would be to eat, sleep and then do activities before eating again?

As much as I'm a fan of a routine, surely the best one is one that is quite like your baby's own one, so that you are generally preempting rather than enforcing.

Yeah I think your right, she's kinda fallen into this naturally so I don't want to start upsetting her. Maybe as she gets older it will change. Suppose 5 weeks is still tiny. Thanks for your help

At 5 weeks she probably can't be awake more than an hour/hour and quarter anyway, so by the time she's woken, fed, nappy change and winded, the time is probably up. As she gets older the awake stretch gets a bit longer. I tend to think more in terms of 'pattern' than 'routine' as that word always seems to make people think of schedules. It's roughly the EASY pattern, with a bit of dozing in the morning and a split feed around bath at 6ish. Evenings are starting to settle down, she was asleep at 8pm tonight, will probably wake at 4am.