dealing with exhusted baby.

[candr]

I have posted a few times on sleep advice for my 9m old and we are doing the pick up/ calm back down method. So far tonight have been in about 10 times. When he cries he really screams and sounds between really upset and really cross. If we try to pat/rub his back he gets quite distressed that he is not being picked up but when we do he pushes away from us and does not seem to find a position he feels relaxed in.

If you put him back down he just screams again. He sleeps on front and will roll over if put on back but am trying to put him down semi awake to learn to self settle. I don't think it is wind so has anyone else had this and what did you do?

Have been trying this for a few nights but does not seem to be working. If he comes into bed with me he sleeps really well but it means DH in spare room so don't do this unless he is ill.
He has a good bedtime routine and room is calm and dark.

Why don't you just co-sleep until he's ready to be by himself, or at least move the cot back into your room? It sounds as though he really wants to be near you at night and he's expressing it in the only way he has.

Co-sleep with him. He needs and wants you. Let him have you.

Have you tried holding him until he is fast asleep then putting him down? I know self-settling seems like the holy grail - I'm guilty of putting DD down to self-settle when it is eventually not worth it - but it does sound as though he isn't ready for it. Maybe you could sit in his room and cuddle him until he finally nods off?