Night time dryness

[PeppermintCream]

My 5 year old DS has been in pants for just over two years. He has never been dry at night. I tend to take a lazy laid back approach to not wetting at night, knowing that it requires certain hormones to kick in.

However, he has become self conscious about wearing pyjama pants, and created himself a sticker chart. Five nights later, not a single sticker...

Shall I just get him to put the chart to one side for a few months, or is there anything else I can try eg waking him at night time to go to the loo?

I would appreciate any pearls of wisdom you have to offer.

It's not so unusual - you're right there is a certain hormone that has to kick in to allow dry nights, so if that's not happening, it's not his fault. I know of 6/7 yr olds just among my own friends who are not dry yet.
Does he drink a lot before bedtime?

Maybe try and ensure he has bedtime drinks early enough so a wee before bedtime limits what is in his bladder a bit.

We had the same problem. Ds had been potty trained for 2.5 years at 5 but night time dryness was elusive. He was getting quite about it and I was exhausted trying with night time waking to strip the bes etc and extra laundry. So I said screw it and started him to pee before I went to bed. Suddenly he began to be dry. We got told off by the school nurse (well my dh did) for 'training' him to pee at night. But doing this restored his confidence and meant he could stop the nappies. Then after a coupleof months I stopped waking him. Believe it or not he is still dry! Takes himself to the toilet if he needs too. Joy. This may not work for you, but it worked for us. I know there is a magical hormone that helps dryness but I think sometimes you need to do something to help it along.

dd1 had never had a dry night nappy at 4.11. Then we had the odd one, then a few more, and then totally dry by 5.1. It just happened.

before then, we sat her down and talked about the hormone business, and how it was no more within her control than having blonde hair and blue eyes, which helped her not stress about it.

we don't allow drinks after her dinner at 5.30pm, which is roughly 90mins before bed.

Completely normal until at least 7. But you know that. Does he? How has he become self conscious about pull ups?

O personally wouldn't bother with the lifting, especially if he is a heavy sleeper. As dingbats said, it can quite often just train them to pee at the same time every night, whether they have been lifted or are still in bed. It certainly didn't work with any of mine, although it made a slight indent into the amount of laundry (Ds floods through pull ups and so we have to launder sheets, duvets and even pillows most days).

At 7, the GP will suggest either meds to mimic the hormone (desmotabs) or an enuresis alarm. Some people do go down the alarm route earlier if they think that heavy sleep is the culprit rather than hormones, and the child is very motivated, but I think you would struggle to find a practitioner to advise it at five, and you would have to just order one (I like malem).

I'm not sure I would do it at this point though, I would reassure him that it is absolutely normal, and try to work on the self conscious stuff, wherever that came from.

Limiting drinks had no effect on my DS :( Only think that worked was the lifting. You could also attempt cloth training pants at night rather than pull ups/ pyjama pants. Or a friend of mine find her son only sleeps without wetting while wearing nothing on his lower half (living dangerously).

Thank you. At the moment, I don't want to live too dangerously so think we'll keep the pull ups for now.

I'll think about limiting drinks, and have a chat with him.

I think he is self conscious because he's started to go to friends houses/ invite people back to ours a lot more, but will check to see if there is anything else.

I'll give it another couple of weeks, then think about waking him when I go to bed, so that he can nip to the loo. At the moment it just feels a bit harsh to wake him from his lovely sleep.

Thank you all of you for your replies.

Although your DS seems to have initiated it himself, I don't really see the point of sticker charts for something that they have no control over. When you say you don't want to live dangerously, I can understand that, but have you ever tried putting him to bed without pull ups? DS never had a dry nappy in the morning, but when I tried him without a nappy at night, he never wet the bed.

I used the 'lifting' method with my ds 40 years ago and it worked.When dgs was still wet at night at 4.6 while his little brother was dry at 2.3 I suggested my dd try it.She took him for a wee when she went to bed each night-he always weed then but the bed was dry.One night I was babysitting and they forgot to ask me to do it as they would be late.I didnt lift him and he was dry.After about 6 weeks they stopped taking him and while there is an occasional accident he is dry at least 9 nights out of 10 [now 5.8].
fwiw his brother has never had a wet bed.He was 3 in Feb.