Stammering and the available help

[misscph1973]

My son has just turned 5 and he has had a stammer since he was 3. He is registered at the local speech therapy center and we have attended a few sessions but to be honest I think they are completely useless.

I have had a meeting with the head of his school just to let her know what I am doing / not doing and she was not surprised that I wasn't impressed with the speech therapy available for his age as her experience with the next team (from age 6 and up) wasn't that different.

My son's stammer is sometimes really bad and some times really good and it does seem to very slowly be getting better (very slowly). The therapy we went to involved learning how to implement "special time", a concept used at the Michael Palin center and I have also on the threapist's recommendation read "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk", a really good book, and we have made some changes in our communication and general behaviour. However I am really frustrated and really unhappy - I am myself a talker and so is my son's father and his older sister. I feel that I need to do more and that I am not helping my son enough. The speech therapist says that it's not a quick fix when my son is in a bad period and when he is in a good period, she takes all the credit for it.

I would really appreciate advice from people in similar situations!

When you say that you have attended 'a few session' is it regular weekly sessions and do you have 'homework' to carryout at home?

Is the school willing to use the methods that SALT say will be effective?

I had a stammer and my DD has SAL difficulties, i agree that there isn't a quick fix and sometimes there seems to be little progress, but then a big improvement in one go.

Keeping the child's confidence up, is the biggest battle.

Hi Birdsgottafly,

I went to one play group for children with speech difficulties, but I didn't return as it was a waste of time - the threapist could not remember any of the names of the 3 attending children after an hours name games.

Then I attended the 6 sessions for learning (they were meant to be weekly but there were many cancellations and a break of 8 weeks as the speech therapist was off sick) to use special time that were available to us. I did the home work (practising special time). I must admit I have stopped doing it now as I didn't see much progress but the practice has rubbed off in our daily life positively, so to speak.

The school was given a hand out from the SALT that it took them 4 reminders over 4 month to send (they refused to give it to me so I could pass it to the school) to them. This 1 page handout contained nothing they were not already doing because it is common sense (let the child finish what he is saying, be patient etc). The school has been very cooperative and supporting.

We have worked a lot on my son's confidence and it has massively improved (bordering on too big an ego sometimes...). He doesn't seem to bothered about the stammering, only when it's really bad (usually when he is tired and there has been a lot on).

I appreciate that you seem to have the same experience, it's quite nice to have confirmed that maybe the speech therapy is as good as it gets.

Did you see the tv programme about the Michael Palin centre on BBC last year?

My ds started to stammer from the age of about 2 and we were frequently told that he would "grow out of it"......he didn't.
Like you, we tried to get speech therapy for him, we had to battle to get what little we did as in our area it is pretty much non-existent, and we also had no joy with it at all. We tried everything they suggested, but nothing really worked for him. He was eventually signed off by them with no hope of any further therapy at the age of 9 with the heartbreaking diagnosis that he has a severe stammer....yeah thanks for that......
We were lucky in that right from being small we tried to bring ds not to be self conscious about his stammer, we didn't want it to be an issue that dominated his life to the extent that he daren't do anything or want to go anywhere. This was ok in principle, and fortunately ds was a very happy and confident child, but of course it wasnt true, the stammer did dominate his life.
I don't think people who have never had any contact with a stammerer truly realise what a cruel, isolating thing it is.....shyness is hard but at least if you can smile and say hello you can break the ice, but what if you can't even get the 'h' out, never mind the whole word? I used to lay awake at night worrying about how ds would cope at secondary, how he would be able to go out as a teenager, how he would fare in interviews, god it was just awful.
Our salvation came in the form of an organisation called the Starfish Project, and I cannot tell you how every day I'm so grateful we found them. Unfortunately your ds is still too young to attend their courses as yet but I wanted to let you and anyone else interested about them, as it is not too dramatic to say they changed our lives, and I can never thank them enough. They are a non-profit making organisation run by the truly inspirational Anne Blight and her husband David, and the difference they have made to my ds and the hundreds of other recovering stammerers is nothing short of incredible.
They have a website, www.starfishproject.co.uk and I strongly recommend you to take a look at it.
My ds left secondary school on Thursday, after 5 amazing years there, his fb status was praising the school and the fabulous friends he has had there, and they all chipped in to buy their teacher a present......the rest of the class nominated ds to give it to him and say a few words because, in their words, "he's the best speaker"!!!! To say I cried when I heard that is an understatement because never in a million years did I ever expect to hear those words.
I apologise if this post is long, especially as your ds is still too young, I guess I just wanted to let you know help is there, even when you feel totally on your own fighting the battle, and that stammers can be overcome, and that you're not on your own. Xxxx

Have you considered the lidcombe programme speech therapy? Are you in london or did you travel to the michael palin centre, as there is a clinic in london perhaps you could contact them and see if they would accept a referral for your ds? All the info seems to be for a summer intensive course for older children but they could probably tell you more, or tell you if anywhere nearer you offers the same programme.

Sorry for being away from my own thread!

ladymariner, thank you so much, not at all too long a post, I loved to read about your experiences and I am so happy for you and your son, what a sunshine story! Will definitely look into starfish, thank you so much!

littleducks, unfortuantely I am not in London. I am within travelling distance, though. I am a bit reluctant to contact them as my local SALT use the same principles - that hasn't worked for us. I don't knwo lidcombe, I will look into it.

The Lidcombe stammering programme is excellent, but is most effective before a child turns 6. I dont think the NHS offer lidcombe, and if they do it will probably be a very long waiting list. If at all possible, consider a private SALT specialising in Lidcombe therapy. It cured my DS's stammer in four months, amazing.

You're very welcome misscph, and I hope you get the help and support you and your ds deserve. If I can help any further please let me know. Xxxx

PoptartPoptart, how did you find a therapist specialising in Lidcombe and was it very expensive?

PoptarPoptart, I have just been researching the Lidcombe approach, and it wasn't all positive :( Can you tell me a bit about what happned when you DS had Licombe therapy?

Misscph2973, I know I'm dragging up an old thread but just wondering how your ds is getting on now?

I'm in a very similar situation now with my ds (nearly 5) as you were 6mths ago.

I know how heart breaking this can be. My DD2 had a very bad stammer from when she began talking until she was about 4 1/2. She often could not get a word out and would stamp her feet in frustration. I remember trying to fight the tears as I stood there not interrupting and giving her time like I was told to, while she got more and more upset with herself.
All I can say is that she is now 9 and has absolutely no problems at all. She speaks very clearly and confidently. I often say I wished I had recorded her at the worst times to show other parents that even children with really severe stammers can come through it unscathed!

Also, when her brother was a baby I 'recruited' her to help teach him to talk. I told her she had to say words very clearly so that he could hear them really well (using baby 'first words' picture books) This took her back to the 'one word at a time' stage, which she never really went through (she seemed to go from not talking to attempting full conversations over night) and seems to coinside with when we started to see dramatic improvements.

Thank you KrisE, what a kind post. I'm so happy that your dd managed to overcome her stammer. That's what I'm really hoping for ds, that it is just a phase. The longer it goes on, the more I worry.

We have good days & not so good days. And yes, at times, it's difficult to witness. I worry he'll get teased at school.