Walking (really really need some advice and reassurance!)

[curiousgeorgie]

My DD is now 20 months and still doesn't walk...

We've slowly lost all our activities as her 'friends' move up and she stays in a class with babies. At swimming the next step was to step in from the side and she can't do it... At Gymboree she is with some 6 month olds :s

We've been to the GP, to hospital, then for x rays, ultrasounds and to see the consultant. The general diagnosis is that she may have had something wrong with her but that she doesn't anymore.

But she won't walk. (or can't!)

I've got her walking toys, but she won't walk with them. She just stands for a minute then sits down. I lay small toys in a line along furniture and hope she'll go all along, she cruises a few steps but then just sits.

How did you help your DC's learn to walk? When did they walk? And what could they already do by the time they took their first steps? (ie, standing alone? Just cruising?)

I'm so stressed out about this. I even dream she can walk! :)

Anybody?

My DD1 was 10 months when she walked and she only crawled for about 2 months before that... She never cruised. This isn't a stealth boast, I'm just making the point that she missed out stages and went straight to walking.
My nephew was 19 months before he took a step.
I think if doctors have checked her out and she's fine, I'd try not to worry.
Your DC will walk in their own time... You may find they just get up and walk one day.
Im no expert but I think there's a very wide range for what's normal with children. For example my DD1 said her first words at 13/14 months. Her cousin is 2.2 and doesn't say a single word... That's an entire years difference in development and no one seems the slightest bit concerned he's not talking.
I also never encouraged DD1 to walk... She just did. I'm only guessing but toddlers seem to do the opposite of what you're desperate for them to do... Maybe stop trying to get her to walk and just let her do it in her own time.
Please don't worry... I can't imagine she will get to 3 and not be walking. It will happen.

Ask to be referred to a Paediatric Physio - they are the experts in walking and will be able to give you good advice.

I absolutely share your pain. My DD didn't walk at all until 16 months and quite a number of times I felt like she was getting "left behind"!

A couple of things which seemed to help get my daughter interested in walking were:

• My husband or I walking with her, holding her hand.
• Encouraging her to walk between my husband and I (he and I kneeled a metre or so apart and she took a couple of steps between us. We then gradually moved apart so she had to take a few more steps each time).
• Giving her something to hold in her hand when standing (this, apparently, makes small children feel as though they have something "supporting" them and makes them feel more secure)
• Insisting that she "moved up" with her friends (and was not left with the babies) so that she could see all the exciting things you can do when you can walk!

Having said all this, the doctor at the time said not to worry at all as there is a massive difference (as QueenCee said) in when children start to walk and there are not only lots of physical factors but also lots of social factors which feed into skills like this (my daughter, for example, is bilingual so her brain was having to find the capacity to deal with twice as much language development, which can allegedly slow down the development of some gross motor skills in some cases. She also has no siblings, so there wasn't much desire to get up and race around with them!).

Have you been referred for physio? I am guessing the consultants have ruled out any reason for her not walking. Is she delayed in any other areas? Is she mobile - crawling/bumshuffling?

In the meantime I would have a word with the people who run the classes and see whether she can move up, despite not being a walker, as it may help to have her peers walking around her.

Ds is delayed in all areas, he is nearly 2 and has been cruising for a couple of months and only crawling for the last month. We do a music/dance class and he has been able to move up with the children who developmentally are about a year ahead of him (I would be furious if they wanted to keep him back!)

I begged for her to move up, especially at Gymboree as I've been taking her since she was 8 weeks old with a group of my friend and babies and we always made a day of it, with lunch and the park. I was gutted, and subsequently I don't see thos friends hardly ever anymore as they are all doing activities my dd can't do.

They haven't referred us for physio. We have another appointment with the consultant in July and I'll mention it then.

She started crawling at about 15 months, has recently started pulling herself up on the furniture but that's about it. After reading the post above yours DH and I just now got straight on the floor with her in between us and tried to make her go between us, but she just had a massive tantrum and. On tortes her body until she could sit back down.

It sounds so stupid but I feel like I can't take it anymore. I'm so stressed. It's 100% all I think about.

I wonder if when you see the physio you could ask for a letter to give to the class leader saying that going up a class would be beneficial to her.

Dd2 walked at 21 months and just had slightly bendy ankles that needed support - do her feet roll in or out at all?

If she is not delayed in other areas I would say don't worry too much, the fact she can bear weight and cruise is all good, and you are seeing people that can help if there are any issues, but it might just be that she is wary of taking those first few independent steps.

Can you arrange some activities which aren't based around physical stuff? Swimming, music, children's centre stuff. Now the weather is nice could you arrange to meet friends you made in classes at the park etc?

Actually - they do roll out. Can that be something they missed?

I do try to arrange other stuff but they are all so busy with rubgytots, ballet, Gymboree and tumbletots (things DD can't do!) that it's really difficult.

We're having to repeat her swimming term with the hope sge'll walk before next term so she doesn't have to repeat it a third time :s

DS1 walked at 16 mths
DS2 19 mths
DD1 20 mths
DS3 11 mths.

Just relax! I stopped going to playgroups as I got sick and tired of everyone telling me that dd would walk soon, and head tilting. I didn't care one jot having had a child before that walked really late.

Oh btw DD is the brightest in her class and is a really quick runner!

DD (my third child) is 17months now and very frustratingly not walking. Shes one of 6 girls in our little hamlet all born within a month and guess what..by a long way she's the only one not walking. At tots group, I sit and drink tea with the babies whilst DD's peer group are outside running around. The little girl closest to us in age, born a week earlier, walked at 8 months so it feels like an absolute eternity ago (same child is cheekily gorgeous, but an absolute freak of nature she can now hold a pencil properly and mark makes, she climbs up and uses a big swing at the park, shes another youngest of three).

I find myself building activities around getting her on her feet. I know that it'll come with time shes not even my PFB its just I want to walk her in the park and feed the ducks in the sunshine, not be pushing her in a buggy or carrying her on my hip.

Its kind of isolating when everyone else appears to be moving on.

All that being said she is a very very laid back child who sleeps fantastically and rarely gives me a moments bother so really I have nothing to moan about and maybe just a bit great big heep of the green eyed monster when others are ahead. By the time they're school age no one will know who walked first.

Issima - from showing no interest to walking what did she do? Was she standing unaided? Cruising loads? Walking with toys or did it just happen unexpectedly?

I can't even work out if she can't walk or won't. To me she seems far too unsteady but people keep telling me 'it'll happen any day now!!' (that was Christmas though so clearly wrong! Said person now says 'I only said that to make you feel better.')

It's so hard to pretend you don't care though.

She did start sleeping through early, is a very calm baby and just fantastic - but anything she is actually good at no one sees. I think they all feel sorry for her which just kills me.

Hi, my DS is just 22months and has only been walking properly for about 6 weeks. He didn't crawl until one week before his first birthday although he sat up really early, then just decided to stay sitting. He started cruising at about 18months but only about 3 steps holding onto furniture. We were seen by HV who decided they wouldn't refer him unless he wasn't walking by 2. He does have one foot that sticks out slightly and still does and the HV seems to think it will correct itself in time.
I was very frustrated with him as of all the comments from other people asking why he didn't crawl and then why he didn't walk so can totally understand. Neither me nor my DH were late walkers. However, once he finally did it there was no stopping him and he has completely changed in 6 weeks and wants to walk everywhere all the time and is no longer happy to just sit in the buggy!
Before he crawled and then before he walked I was told by HV and several others that he was very intelligent as he would sit still and play with one toy for ages and really focus on it and want to know how it worked etc. So there can be some advantages! Like you people were always telling me he'll do it soon and that went on for months and months, but they were right! No one knows/cares by the time they're about 3/4 who walked at what age etc!

My DD1 was 21 months before she walked alone. I feel your pain. It's just so visible that they're 'behind' isn't it? You seem to see all these tiny tots running around. I was dreaming about it too!

She only got mobile at all at about 13 months, and was a bum-shuffler. Can't remember exactly when she started pulling herself up to stand but that was late too, maybe 18 months. She didn't do a lot of independent cruising. She spent a good few weeks walking perfectly competently, but only when holding onto our hands. Eventually she just seemed to have built up her confidence enough to do it herself and let go.

She's always been very cautious, not one to rush into new situations, so I think she just wanted to be sure she could do it. She's now 3 and is still not the most physically adept child but is well within normal limits, I'd say.

Just keep letting her have plenty of opportunities to practise being on her feet without any pressure to perform (but lots of praise if she does!).

As with so many others, my DD2 didn't walk till 22mths and then suddenly walked all the way accross the room! She didn't even cruise much, but could crawl so fast she looked like her knees didn't touch the floor! I was told that it wouldn't be considered an issue till she was 2yo. Hope she walks soon.

Actually, I'm sure it seems like nothing, but two minutes ago she just took two steps, sort of shuffled her feet behind her walk along dog! (It was quite exciting to me ha ha!)

Most walk along toys just tip up as she holds onto them but this dog is huge (meant as a ride on) so I thought it was the beast pushing aid!

I emailed Gymboree (with a quote from this thread) saying that I'd love to come to the older class with my friends and that I feel she would benefit but they said no. Apparently there wouldn't be anything for her to do...

curious Woo hoo! She's off . I try to get DD to hold my hands and toddle around the house. She would always sit down immediately, shake her head and say 'no'. This week she just went for it and really enjoys it - she cries when I stop, but doesn't have the confidence to go solo. I think nursery have helped - she goes 2 mornings a week, and they seem pretty into Mission:Babyissimma walking.
katie DD sat independently really early too. And then just didn't move for months.

Be careful what you wish for.

Dd crawled a week before her first birthday and walked at seventeen and a half months, nothing in between, she just stood up one day and walked. They just seem to know when theyre ready.Shes four now and we have the reverse problem, she wont sit still!