Nursery expressing concern about dd's speech but I can't see what the problem is

[perceptionreality]

My dd is 3.1 and she goes to a very good nursery for 2 days a week. It's rated 'excellent' for every aspect by Ofsted.

Yesterday the nursery manager said that they want to make an appointment to talk to me about dd's langauage acquisition as she isn't talking as much as they had hoped. When she started, they were really pleased with her progress. But I feel that as she went from not going to nursery at all to going 2 days a week, she was bound to initially make a lot of progress and then plateau a bit.

I see no reason for concern because as far as I can see, her language is fine for her age. She asks questions, she tells me what she likes, how she feels and her play skills are normal imo. She also knows where her stuff is most of the time and will follow instructions. I have an older child with severe SEN and also another who is NT and I really don't see any signs of abnormal development in dd3. She does have glue ear which I explained to them may affect her hearing.

OTOH, I can't see why a nursery would raise concern unless they genuinely had one. And they must have lots of experience etc. I was wondering whether they just had higher expectations for her than she has fulfilled? To me she seems like a typical 3 year old.

Any experience?

.

Sometimes it is easier for an outsider to spot a speech issue - as her mother you will be able to understand her much better than anyone else.

Can you see any negative/risk to meeting with the nursery about her speech? At best if there is a problem they might be able to help address it, at worst there isn't a problem and nothing happens. The nursery might want to put more effort into working on her speech with her, which any child would benefit from.

Have you observed her in nursery? Is she talking as much there as she does at home?

It may be as simple as that - it's a noisy environment which I guess may make the hearing thing worse, and she may be withdrawing a bit there as a result.

Is she on the list for speech therapy already? What is happening about the glue ear?
The nursery will be able to refer her to the SALT, if she hasn't been refered already.
They are only trying to do what is best for your daughter. You are an expert on your daughter, but they will have lots of experience of children her age. I would trust their judgement. Children are often different at home than they are in the setting.
If they refer her and the therapist says there is nothing wrong, then that's good, isn't it?
OTOH, if they refer her and she does need therapy, than that's good too, isn't it?

I am happy to have a meeting with them. If she did have a problem, then far from burying my head in the sand I would want to address it. I have not observed her at nursery so far. What I do know is that she's one of the youngest - most of the kids will start school this September I think. It is a very noisy, busy nursery. Lately, they have started putting her in with the little ones in a small group because 'she talks more', apparently.

I'd just be interested to hear what they have to say. Nice that they're interested and pro-active.

She has been referred about the glue ear and also I will see the HV this week. Thanks for replies - I really doubt they would say anything just to worry me.

If they are excellent in every way then I would trust that they have a concern. It might not be her speech per se, she might just need a change in her environment ie putting her in with the younger ones now and again as they are already doing.

I think it's great they want to talk to you. Nip any issues she might have in the bud.

If the nursery has outstanding then one of the areas where they are going above and beyond is possibly involving parents and developing parental partnerships. It might just be a case of involving you in making sure they are meeting her individual needs and just want your input and opinions and to hear what she is like at home and whether you have any concerns or not. It's not always possible or advisable to talk about children in a busy nursery when the children and other parents are present.

Yes, that's true. They are always telling me how 'bright' she is. Tbh she seems average to me (in a normal way). I suppose that's why I wondered if they had high expectations of her iyswim. But as you say they have a lot of experience. I imagine if she can't hear well that probably isn't helping. She gets ill a lot and has been on antibiotics about 6 times in the last year - that's more than my other children in their lives combined.

ICAN have a speech and language checker on their website - you answer a series of questions to find out if development is age appropriate.

Thanks BranchingOut - where is it on the site, I can't find it.

here is a good developmental checker

Thanks insancerre - she seems to come out as normal on that test for the age 3 one (is 3.1).

Good, just go to the meeting and listen to what they have to say. They can't refer her to any professionals without your consent anyway. As long as you are happy with her development then it's down to the nuursery to make sure they are doing their bit to meet her needs. With glue ear she will need some adjustments, like a quieter environment and sitting at the front at circle time etc.

I would get a referral- really what is there to lose?

DS teacher thought he was borderline - we said yes to referral. Speech Therapist has no issues with him.

You will understand your own child perfectly regardless whether they have any speech issues, though in all probability she is fine.

Ok, I've known them for a long time and addressing anything early will prepare her for school - I think they did say they were going to put some stuff in place to help her.

One issue I have with her is that she nags me to have her dummy all day, which of course will stop her talking. I wonder why she feels the need to have it in the day? I have a rule that she can only have it for bed.

Thanks again for replies.

everything - yes I think her language development is ok, but a speech issue is different isn't it?

The health visitor came today and did a full development check - she said dd is on track for her age - all of her scores were age appropriate and speech and language is slightly above. She did say that the glue ear may be causing her to not be able to properly hear what is going on in a busy environment like a nursery but said she was happy to hear her chattering away at home today.

I suppose I'll just wait for the hearing test.

My ds (reception age) has glue ear and when he can't hear he speaks less and even reverts to signing, particularly after he's had a double ear drum perforation and he can't hear at all. It can be one of the first signs of him having an ear infection. Could she be not speaking in a noisy environment because she can't hear?

He's had so many antibiotics for ear infections (ear drum bursts if we don't get them quickly) that I think he's averaging just under 15 a year so far. Makes for an interesting conversation with any doctor that wants to give him an antibiotic he hasn't had too often-there isn't one. This year's been better so I'm hoping we're on the upwards.

On the "bright" side, I think nurseries do seem to use "bright" to mean above average. Unfortunately a lot of parents hear it as "your child is very much above average and well above all their peers" which causes problems later on. Just enjoy your dd for who she is-as it sounds like you do.

Interesting, DeWe my dd has had lots of antibiotics as well. I don't even like the term 'bright' - it tends to be used in a snobbish way and I think in any case you can't tell a child's potential at 2 or 3. To me she seems average and like any other child though.