my baby is a head banger?

[mamaLou13]

Hi my dd is 20 mo. She is always having tantrums over the most minor things like can't reach something, not alowed something etc. but the problem is she throws herself on the floor and bangs her head, sometimes she does it reasonably gently and watches for a responce others like tonight she does it really hard and makes herself cry more. I have tried telling her no very nicley and explaining why. I have tried telling her off, I have tried completley ignoring it but nothing has worked so far.
Any ideas?

One of mine head banged during tantrums

I moved them to carpet and left them to it

You have noticed that she is looking for a response, clever wee gurl, and you are doing the right thing by ignoring. Make yourself a cup of tea, flick through a mag, pretend that the headbanging is just so DULL and BORING that it's not worth even looking at IYSWIM

If you have hard floors throughout get a carpet sample square and pop it under her before walking away

Tantrums caused by frustration like this should never be ignored - at this age she's not being a Little Nero she's desperate to be able to do things and needs your help. It may seem minor to you but it's a huge deal to her. Distract from things she can't have, help her to get to things she can, help her do the things she wants to but most of all comfort her, assure her of your help and help her to manage these big feelings she's having. She needs to know she can rely on you for help, not feel abandoned and even more desperate.

When she's older she may have tantrums over not being allowed chocolate or whatever, but if you've helped her manage her anger and frustrated feelings at this age then you will probably find that tantrums become a thing of the past.