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DS has been attacking children and adults at preschool... how worried should I be?

9 replies

colditz · 06/02/2006 17:00

When I picked ds (2.10) up from preschool, one of the nursery nurses came and told me that ds has attacked 2 children and one of the assistants when she tried to intervene. She basically had to pull him off.

She seemed to think it was because he was trying to talk to them and they didn't understand him, and he lost his temper. He scratched their faces. He has been made to say sorry, which he did, and was cheerful and placid when I picked him up.

My first reaction was appalled at his behavior today, it is totally unlike him (although I suppose all mothers think that), but my second reaction is of deep sadness, that his speech is so poor that I can only understand about half of what he says, so what chance does he have trying to make himself understood to a 3 year old? Is he feeling alienated fromhis peers? He is a very friendly child, he always say hello and waves to total strangers. Am I setting him up for misery when his peers don't understand him? Would I be better to take him out of preschool until his speech improves?

Or, on the other hand, is this my fault and I am not disciplining him properly? Is he turning into a spoilt brat? I try to be firm, consistant, blah blah blah, but sometimes he is so disobedient I have to shout to make him even deign to look at me, never mind obey.

Or, option 3, am I reading too much into this, being paranoid, and it is in fact something all children do and was probably a one off?

I don't know, I can't stop worrying now!

OP posts:
juliab · 06/02/2006 17:06

Hey Colditz. Poor you. Is this the first time your ds has done anything like this? If so, I shouldn't read too much into it (easy to say, I know!) - he wouldn't be the first kid to do this and I'm sure he's not going to be the last!

nutcracker · 06/02/2006 17:07

He could have just been having a bad day, feeling tired, whatever, so i wouldn't jump to any conclusions just yet.

ASsh the nursery to keep you well informed of any problem they may have and then take it from there.

Has he had his speech assessed ??

nutcracker · 06/02/2006 17:07

ASK the nursery even

colditz · 06/02/2006 17:10

I am waiting for an appointment to see his speech and language therapist. He has been VERY tired today, because he was still roaming about in his bedroom singing to himself at 11pm last night. Usually he is flat out by 9!

I do hope that is all it is....

OP posts:
Twiglett · 06/02/2006 17:15

option 3

zippitippitoes · 06/02/2006 17:15

maybe he is "sickening for something", I wouldn't worry too much as yet

fairyjay · 06/02/2006 17:44

Colditz
I can never stop worrying when something like this happens, and I do feel for you. But, give it a couple of weeks, and you'll wonder why you got so worked up about it.
My ds had to have serious speech therapy, and still doesn't speak as well as his peers, but his character and personality bring him through.
Nobody tells you when you have kids, that you never stop worrying, do they?!!

mrspitt · 06/02/2006 17:50

Colditz my ds went to playgroup at 2.10 and his speech was a problem, still is at 4 but is getting better. He used to hit out and be quite aggressive and i am convinced it was because he was not understood by the other kids. In fact after he had been there for 3 months i found out even the staff had difficulty understanding him. So i thought well no wonder he's annoyed and no-one bothered to tell me for so long!

Don't read too much into it yet though and i certainly wouldn't take him out, its all a learning curve

getbakainyourjimjams · 06/02/2006 18:29

It is common for children with speech problems to become frustrated. It's good that the nursery have recognised the likely cause.

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