Tell me about your ADHD child.

[tanfastic]

I hope you don't mind me asking.
What is considered symptoms of ADHD and how can you tell the difference between these symptoms and what's considered normal boisterous behaviour?
I'm a bit worried about my nearly four year old.

What's worrying you?

At almost 4 I think it would be quite difficult to tell the difference. I had no idea that ds1 had ADHD at that age and I would have been hard pushed to say that ds3 didn't. They were both very "active" boys.

Looking back it was the strange things that marked ds1 as different. He was a happy baby and loved everyone. He would hold his arms up to strangers to be lifted, he never had a 'clingy' phase and he showed no particular preference for me although I was his main carer.

He dribbled, and I mean dribbled. The whole front of his t-shirt would be soaked, much like a teething baby but was just as bad at 4.

He was always the child that spilt his drink no matter where we were. We could be with friends with much younger children and I could guarantee whose drink would go over. It became a bit of a joke.

He appeared very clever. He could count to 100 before he was 2 and shortly afterwards could read all the numbers on the street doors as we passed. I thought he was a genius but I now think that wasn't normal. He couldn't figure out jigsaws at all.

He simply couldn't follow instructions. I knew he wasn't really naughty but he just didn't seem able to do as he was asked. He was the same where ever he was and whoever he was with.

In comparison ds3 is boisterous, doesn't alwast do as I ask him but always does as his teacher says. Is a monster at home and a little delight at school/after school club.

What concerns do you have?

My dd was slightly different from around age 3 cuddling and kissing strangers, always up to mischief at nursery hiding from nursery workers to make them think they had lost her, flooding the toilets by blocking.up sinks with toilet roll and turning taps on. Very low impulse control, I'd tell her oven was hot so she would touch it anyway.. just to make sure! At nearly 8 she talks ten to the dozen, is very good at sports, still got very low impulse control, frequently says innappropriate things or does something silly. Endless energy and needs little rest. As a baby and toddler she was always smiling and always happy but always hungry!!!

Thanks for the replies, are your children like it all the time? It does sound like my ds has similar type behaviour but not all the time. I'm finding it difficult to know whether he's just being a sod or whether he really can't help it and has a problem.

His behaviour at times can be appalling, violent tantrums, screaming, throwing things, tipping things over, throwing his slipper down the toilet etc etc. His attention span is tiny, he talks non stop, interrupts all the time, is rude etc. But he's not like it all the time, mainly when he's tired or not getting his own way.

After Xmas I tried the 123 Magic book and it worked fantastically for about two months but then he started playing up again and it wasn't working.

They tell me at nursery he's a little love. He has me on the verge of tears most days.

My mum has moved in for a few weeks recently until her house purchase goes through and his behaviour is the worst I've ever seen it. My mum is even shocked. I'm wondering whether that has something to do with a change in his circumstances though.

I dunno, sorry for the rambling post but thanks for sharing your stories

For example today his dad took him to the zoo, he's been out for five hours, behaved fantastically all day. Came home and started being rude, throwing his shoes at me, saying he was going to break the window and when I sent him to his room I could hear him throwing large toys at the door in temper. I suspect tiredness?

My dd can be an angel sometimes I think its a myth that kids with ADHD are horrifcally naughty all the time. At football and ttaekwondo practise my dd can be really focussed and reasonably well behaved (unless she's overexcited!). She can be so so lovely when she's helping me do cooking and gardening then suddenly get in a strop for no reason at all and it all kicks off!
I think mothers intuition tells you if something is wrong and if your child is different from others

You have just described my ds!
The only difference is he is no angel in nursery either - but loads better than at home. I have been wondering about ADHD too. Spoke to Some friends with kids though and they reckon he is on the naughty side of 'normal'. I don't think an early diagnosis of ADHD is helpful anyway tbh.
You probably know this already, having my son's double, but we try and avoid tiredness, hunger and boredom. Means you will find us at the park in all weathers and at strange times of the morning but it sure beats being stuck in listening to ds1 smashing up his room!

Not much help but you are not alone!

Ds1 wasn't awful all the time but there were triggers. Change was definitely one of them. Tiredness, hunger, disappointment were others. I learnt to avoid these as far as possible. If we were going out I would tell him earlier in the day and then say we will be going in 10 mins, 5 mins, 1min etc. Even now (he's 16) I will say "computer off in 10 mins" As he hates not having any warning of events and can get quite upset if he's not warned.

We have been fairly strict with all three boys and I do think having firm ground rules and 'all singing from the same hymn sheet' is very important.

Crazyday thanks for the reply, sounds like your child is very very similar to mine. Me and dh were talking earlier and it's only when he's in the house that he's a horror. I really can literally take him anywhere and he behaves impeccably most of the time. I'm like you in that I never stay in unless I have to, it drives me insane so I try and plan things outside the house most days. I dread teatimes, I dread bedtimes, I dread the bit after nursery when he's tired but it's too early for his bed.

Thanks for sharing ladies.

DS2 can act up anywhere, and most of all when something else is stressing him out. Very emotionally immature.

I suspect if you slowed down & paid close attention to him, you'd find consistent points when he starts to blow after school/teatime/bedtime, those are actual triggers to figure out.

You could try keeping a daily log of his behaviour. We are doing this for our ds who is under the care of a psychologist at child and family mental health. It is surprisingly revealing.

We have sleep problems to contend with so we log sleep times and disturbances, tantrums, successes, what was going on at the time etc.

It does help you to see triggers and alter your own behaviour to help him manage his.

Our diagnosis is anxiety and depression but we may also be dealing with ADHD and/or Autism or Aspergers.

My DS has other issues as well, but think of the following:
At 7yrs still climbing kitchen counters unless I stop him
If left alone in the kitchen will get bowls out, pours rice, lentils, porridge, whatever in.
If taken to a supermarket, needs to have his hand held at all time or will disappear
Will have to touch everything in sight
Doesn't stop talking
Never t
Stops moving, unless eating or watching something he likes on tv
Very short attention span
Everything is quick, eats quickly , walks quickly, seems to be always in a hurry
Terrible tamtrums
Exhausting! Like having a toddler, but bigger
Caanit be left alone I Parker Amy public place
Problems with sleeping

Could go on

...in parks or public places.....
Sorry, hate typing IPad!

Tanfastic Our situation is exactly as you have described: public places no problem whatsoever; home a nightmare.

Afaik a child with ADHD is unable to make this distinction as his/her behavior is more impulsive.

Hugging my ds1 as soon as I see him start to become violent or out if control helps a lot.

God I hope it is a phase.