Sharing Toys - is it a myth?

[CheeringBell]

I'm having problems with my Dd nearly 4 years and my Ds nearly 1 years old. My Dd does not want Ds playing with any of her toys and she's hidden them in lots of bags and boxes. I've told her all the toys she doesn't want to share have to stay in her room as I'm fed up of breaking up the fights. All of Ds toys are downstairs as he has a tiny bedroom. I would like both of them to play together downstairs but this does not seem possible.

I was wondering what other parents do when the kids don't share toys?

OK my boys only have 18 months in age difference so it's different. The idea of having one box for special toys for your eldest might be good, or keeping some toys in her bedroom. Also, I use the oven timer a lot. I gave up on the word 'sharing' which is a bit abstract, we used 'taking turn' instead. I would set up the oven timerfor two minutes and when it beeps they would have to swap . We also did lots of swaps. If the little one takes a toy and the eldest wants it, you could tell the eldest to pick another toy to give to little sister to do a swap. I'm not sure it would work every time but it's work a try.

I feel your pain OP. I try to do pretty much what blueberry does but my gap is only 19mo too. DS has a few toys that are his big boy toys because they are too small for DD which he keeps on a high shelf and gets out when DD is asleep but mostly toys are for both of them to avoid the it belongs to me thing. This christmas we gave them toys which were joint presents which really helped but that's harder with a bigger gap I guess. We take turns too, sharing is a hard concept I think! And I encourage swaps (which have to be at least as good if not better than the coveted toy). Also we have a rule that if a toy is lying there unplayed with then it's up for grabs from anyone, at least until their turn is up. Am struggling with snatching at the moment though. Sometimes I feel like its never going to improve!

Thanks for your replies.

Whilst DS was napping I asked DD to go through all her toys downstairs and divide them into toys she was happy to share and ones she didn't. All the non-sharing toys have gone back in her bedroom. I said she can play with them there by herself or bring them downstairs but play with them when DS is napping. She seems to be up for this and was willing to help - she was quite excited to be playing by herself for a bit. I feel sorry for her as she sets things up to play with and then DS comes along and grabs or destroys everything. The plus side is that there are now far less toys in the living room and they did play together for a good 20 mins with the sofa cushions! I don't think DS would get the idea of swops yet - might be worth a try. He just wants whatever DD has in her hand.