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4 yr old bedwetting since baby brother was born

6 replies

fishandlilacs · 15/03/2012 11:10

I have also put this in chat

My 2nd DC is 8 weeks, my 4 yr DD has been day and night dry for over year but she's started wetting the bed. It's getting more frequent-it has been about once a week but it's been 3 nights in a row now.

I have absolutely no idea where to begin with dealing with it. Should I punish, should I ignore? reward charts? lifting? Were pretty sure she's doing it on purpose, but it's hard to say. Up til now we have just been getting her showered and stripping the bed, not making a fuss. I have told her she wont be able to have any sleepovers at friends at the moment until it stops-but not in a punishing way just a matter of fact way.

Please help. I'm tired enough as it is without dealing with this every morning, plus the extra washing, if she does it again tonight she'll be sleeping on bare mattress because I only own 2 waterproof sheets and one is still drying and the other in the wash now.

Thank you

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
heliumballoon · 15/03/2012 14:32

How interesting, I have a 4yr old DD and a 7 week old baby and much the same problem!
I suspect that DD is upset about the new arrival, and also that her sleep is disrupted by the new baby crying at night. Also I have been putting her to bed earlier to deal with the baby.
We had a chat about it at a calm time. I explained that it was difficult for mummy to change the sheets all the time, and she explained that she was scared to go to the bathroom on her own in the night. We practised a special 'mummy daddy I need a wee wee' call, in a singsong voice, and talked about it at bedtime. Then over-praise in the morning if dry. Works well.
Not sure I'd recommend punishment TBH.

legobuilder · 15/03/2012 18:42

No new baby here, but my ds started bedwetting at age 4.3 after a year of dry nights. I asked him (after about 3 weeks) if he thought he could stop it (in which case he could earn a trip to the toy shop), or if he should wear pull ups again; and he voted for pull ups. After 6 months (during which they were wet 4 nights out of seven on average) he asked to stop wearing them, and has been dry since (now 5.2yrs).

I don't think they have much control over it, and while praise and reward work wonders, if it's stressing everyone out I'd vote for pull ups. I'll be interested to see what others say has worked for them though, as I'm about to embark on dry nights for dd, aged 3.1!

Good luck!

threekidsfourcats · 15/03/2012 19:51

they usually all go through a stage of bedwetting, it may be to do with insecurities or worries of playgroups, nurseries changes in their routine and also about the new baby, the attention that baby gets during nappy changes, as my ds did this when i had ds, he was around 3 and after a few nights of bedwetting, and accidents at nursery we kept telling him he was a big boy now and shouldnt be doing that he said why not the baby does it!!, she dosent have to use the toilet....it was short lived maybe a few weeks of maybe 2 wet nights a week and a couple more of nursery accidents.

ilovevenice · 15/03/2012 22:04

Our DS1 had been dry at night for about 8 months when he started bed wetting - it was just before he was due to start at primary school last September. We decided to lift him each evening before we went to bed (basically we were all exhausted!). After he'd been at school for 2/3 weeks, and was settled in, we stopped (and left a potty in his room just in case), and he was absolutely fine. No problems since!

Andrewdavid1 · 04/08/2018 21:48

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CatWithKittens · 05/08/2018 11:01

Lots and lots of love and cuddles for a big girl , lots of requests for "help" with new baby - fetching nappies, cream, clothes etc., emphasis on how good it is to have a big girl to help with all the work that baby makes for Mummy and again how much Mummy loves her big girl. We had daytime regression with one of ours just before she was 5 when a younger one came along - she had been dry for over 2 years before that and the recipe above worked well for her. We really made it a bit OTT at times but to good effect. Punishment simply risks telling her that she is no longer Mummy's much loved child and may encourage her to behave more like the baby to get Mummy's attention back.

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