4 year old behaviour problems

[roggy]

Hi, I am a dad of a 4 year old and 4 month old girls. Our 4 year old is hard work at the moment, reguarly having tantrums, refusing to do what we ask and being quite physical. I know this is not unusual for a 4 year old but I would like some advice on the use of the naughty step if anyone can help. We use it but find it can escalate things. She gets off it continuously and gets more and more agitated as (the advice states) I keep putting her back on it. A 4 minute naughty step takes much, much longer and doesn't really improve things. She asks constantly for her comfort blanket that I refuse to give her.

Do people think I should give her the blanket while on the step as it will calm her down and have others had success with the step?

Many thanks

I don't know the answer however can tell you that my dd who is 4 next week asks for hers too.

I have not tried the naughty step that rigourously with our 4 yr old DS, but the times I have, it always seems to escalate things and make him disproportionately cross. I know it works for some, but perhaps not for everyone?
Is the step is a punishment?
If not but an opportnity to calm down and reflect, then I would give her, her comfort blanket.

naughty steps can be difficult and you really really need to be consistent with its use ,are you giving her the if your behavior does not improve you will go on the naughty step warnings first? we found after a couple of naughty step episodes, her behavior improved on the warnings, and if she gets off then without saying a word put her back on and continue till she has been there for the agreed time, its hard work for the parent esp if you have other small children, but believe me in time it works

I have a four year old son and a 4 month old daughter. i assume from your post he has new twins in his life? If so, you need to be understanding. He's acting up for a reason

Thanks for the responses. We do give warnings that if she does that again she will go on the step, and yes I suppose we are treating it as a punishment. I do put her back when she gets off but she is quite strong and determined so I end up sort of holding her on it. It gets a bit ridiculous and doesn't feel like good parenting. I may try giving her, her blanket as I know it will calm her but does lesson the value as a deterrent.

I think it's right that our new daughter (not twins sorry my sentance wasn't clear) is probably having an impact, though she loves her. I don't want to be too tough I just want her behaviour to improve. Thanks all we will keep at it.