Definition of "gay" for a 7 year old

[melrose]

I have heard DS and friends saying things are "gay" but know he does not know what it means. He asked me the other day what gay meant and I didn't really answer (was trying to get 3 children out the door for school at teh tiem!)

Always intended on being upfront with my children and not at all prudish, but struggling with how to explain this one.

His Godmother is gay, although we rarely see her partner and he just assumes they are friends. Don't want to avoid an explanation if it is asked though,

Any tips appreciated

Some people have boyfriends or girlfriends and get married to people that are the opposite sex to themselves, like you and your DH (or any other couple if you're not part of one) and some with people of the same sex as them like his godmother, gay is a word that is sometimes used to describe that

That's pretty much what I've said to my DC, it's never been a big issue to them tbh

Someone whose partner is the same gender as them. I assume he doesn't know about sex particularly yet and you don't need to go into that. But he knows that grown ups have a partner who they live with/have a family with etc so just that they are the same.

i'd say that some people prefer to have a grown-up relationship with someone the same sex as them

At about age 5, when they be came aware of "gay" being used as an insult in the playground, we said the following -

Some people love people who are the opposite to them, so men fall in love with women, and women fall in love with men. Most people are like this, because that's the way they were made.

But some people fall in love with people who are the same as them, so men fall in love with men and women fall in love with women, and that's because it's how THEY were made.

We also told them it was wrong to use the word gay as an insult, in the same way that's wrong to insult someone because of the colour of their skin, or because they wear glasses....... that the children saying these things are rude, and it's ok to tell a teacher if they are picking on someone.

that's a much better way of explaining oldmum i've made mine sound like a choice

We had to explain it to DD at 6 as it was being bandied around the playground as an insult - her with gay godfathers & my having a very lesbian close friend to name but a few who DD say regularly, I was not best pleased, as we'd prided ourselves on the fact that DD has grown up around both straight & gay couples & takes it all in her stride as quite normal - just as it should be

I explained it as oh XXX (boy in school slinging insults) is obviously being a bit silly & got confused, or listening to silly grown ups who are even more confused - its just another way of being - Daddy & I love each other & are a girl & boy XX & XX love each other & are both boys, YY & YY love each other & are both girls, thats all perfectly okay & perfectly normal, but some people like to give labels to everything, so if its not a lady & a man together as a couple, then they might call them gay - its not an insult though, just another way of being, like some people like to eat meat, some don't, some have brown hair, or green eyes & some don't - its all just different ways to be human beings

DD was more than happy with that & still is at 9, when its come up again at school, she tells them all off for being so silly

- very close lesbian friend - though I'm sure as shes single right now, she'd enjoy being very lesbian too

Assuming he knows and understands that Mummy and Daddy love each other, then just say that some men love/marry men, some women love/marry women. End of.

I grew up with quite alternative/bohemian parents who had several sets of gay couples amongst their friends. I think this is how they explained it to me, or at least is is how I understood it. I was certainly in my late teens when it dawned on me that being gay was an awful lot less common than I thought. I grew up pretty much thinking that gay/straight relationships were about 50/50.