How much sleep is a 2 year old need?

[Tinytoto]

Hi there,

Need some advice...DS is 21 months old and just doesn't sleep well at night anymore or during the day. He was sleeping around 7-7.30pm and would wake at anytime between 6-7.30am but now he is usually fighting sleep and I mean really fighting to go to bed and this would drag on until 8-8.30pm- he would run away from me and get off the bed and just roam around the house (had to observe what he wanted to do a few times as he doesn't talk yet)! He has been sleeping with me on the big bed since he was quite young (hated his cot!).

Our bedtime routine is the normal one;

6.30am: awake
7.30 : breakfas then play or run errands
10 : snack
12pm: lunch (takes him an hour, normal?)
3.30pm : snack
5-5.30pm : tea
6.30pm: bath time etc
7pm : in bed, reading stories and having milk
8-8.30pm -finally falls asleep!

It used to take him 1 hour to fall asleep at bedtimes and naptimes and now naptimes are a battle as well. He fights of naptime sleep until 2/3pm and was usually sleeping at 1pm for upto 2hours.

His naptime is about 1-1.30hrs to encourage him to sleep earlier but it just doesn't happen! Also now I have to resort to letting him watch his fav.dvd or believe it or not carrying him and walking in the house so he would fall asleep, today I had to put him in the buggy and just swinging him back and forth so he would just fall asleep....I think this is encouraging very bad habits and I don't know how to relax and soothe him, as reading stories and keeping everything quite is just not working anymore...what do I do as I take his naptime to get chores done and basically switch off and I find myself raising my voice ( I know he doesn't understand why but I can't seem to stop)and am getting really really frustrated to the point now that I am getting angry all the time.. :(

My ds1 dropped his daytime nap fully around 2yrs old. Just after that his 7pm bedtime became a bit of a battle so he goes to bed at 8pm and falls straight to sleep.

(it also means he gets a hour one on one time with me after his little brother has gone to bed at 7pm which we both enjoy)

I just wasn't prepared to force him into bed at 7pm and have a battle for a hour when I could have a relaxing hour with him and he go straight to sleep when put in bed for 8pm.

He wakes up any time between 6am and 9am.

Oh and when he was in the process of dropping his daytime nap, around the same age as yours, if he didn't want to go to be then I would tuck him up on the sofa with a warm drink and Peppa Pig for some quiet time. Sometimes he's drop off for 20minutes, sometimes not, but it gave him (and me) a chance to recharge.

How frustrating for you. I don't have a magical solution I am afraid. My 2 yr old used to go to sleep well at 7.30 pm but in the last few months has taken an hour or so of us going to his room every 5 mins telling him to lie down. He is in a cot though so a bit different. He was also playing up on the lunch time nap. I think he was overtired and so made sure he ate at 11.30, after running around all morning to wear him out, and then down by 1 after no more than 30 min lunch. He now sleeps for 2 hrs again but who knows if it was because of anything I did!

I'd skip the nap if he is falling asleep any later than 1pm - if he naps late, he is too awake at bedtime. Rather than spending hours trying to get him to sleep, just follow his lead. He may not always know best (of course not) but it is pretty impossible to force anyone to sleep. Plus, if you start getting angry and frustrated because he comes out of the bed, it will turn into a huge amusing game for him (not so much for you!).

DS wakes at 7am, naps at about 12.45. I wake him after 1.5 hours. He gets sleepy again 6 hours after waking (maybe a bit longer) so he's usually in bed by about 8.30/9pm.

He'd go to bed earlier if he had a shorter nap, but usually it results in him being awake for 1.5 hours in the night, so I think he needs a longer nap.

I've always bf'd / rocked /patted him to sleep though.

It could be a developmental leap - DS had several between about 20 months and 2 years, when his sleep went mental. Usually it makes it more difficult for them to 'self-settle'.

thank you for your input... it helps to know what everyone else goes through and talk it out...sometimes we can feel alone especially if you are a parent for the first time and dont have family close by! Thanks again :)