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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Show-off!

2 replies

boogaloo · 20/11/2003 17:32

Does anyone else have a child who, when insecure, shows off appallingly and behaves extremely irritatingly - silly, loud voices, very self-conscious, attention-seeking, babyish behaviour? I've been trying to work out when my ds does this - he's 5 - and it seems to be 1)when he is upset about something but doesn't know how to say 2)when he feels shy 3) when he thinks the person he is talking to doesn't like him. It's almost as though he's making a special effort to appear "up" when he doesn't feel it. I wish he didn't feel he had to do this. Unfortunately, although I can see this, I find the behaviour SO irritating that I exacerbate the problem by telling him off - presumably creating a vicious circle. I'm wondering about teaching him yoga, meditation or something to chill him out/centre him down. He needs to find some stillness inside him. Does anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
rivig · 20/11/2003 17:38

No advice sorry boogaloo but been there frequently except I don't get irritated so much as feeling sorry for dd that she has to behave in such a way so try to talk quietly without embarrasing dd which of course often means leaving her to it so as not to draw even more attention! I too would be interested in others ways of dealing with such behaviour possibly building self-esteem I suppose is one answer easier said than done!

aloha · 22/11/2003 08:28

I'm not sure that five year olds are meant to have a lot of stillness, personally. I don't mean to sound funny, but is this your problem rather than his? It would be a strange person who judged a five year old who was harmlessly acting up a bit and I presume it doesn't cause him any serious problems. Is the real issue here your own irritation/embarrassment? That's not to say that children can't be irritating and embarrassing, but that's not really their problem, it's ours. I also suspect this is a normal stage as children realise that other people have opinions about them that they care about, not something that troubles a toddler! And like all stages, it will pass on its own. My stepdaughter did this a bit but they do get more socially adept IME.

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