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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD 8 weeks and wants to be held all the time

15 replies

CheshireSplat · 02/03/2012 14:10

First time poster! This may be a silly question, but my DD is 8 weeks old and hates being put down. Basically I carry her around all day, which isn't too much of a problem, though does make showering, lunch etc more difficult and gives me a bit of backache. However, she sleeps pretty well at night and can sometimes settle herself so it isn't causing sleeping problems.

Is this normal? Should I be putting her down and letting her cry so she gets used to it? That isn't my natural reaction, but I do sometimes want to get on and do some things round the house.

Thanks.

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Flisspaps · 02/03/2012 14:13

Absolutely normal. She still has no concept of being a separate entity or that you'll come back if you go away! She doesn't need to be put down to get used to it, that should come in time, but there are almost always going to be times when holding her isn't practical :)

Do you have a sling? That should make eating more easy, and getting on with things around the house. Do you have a DP who can tend to DD when you shower (it might mean moving your day around a bit and showering very early on or in the evenings)

NatashaBee · 02/03/2012 14:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alana39 · 02/03/2012 14:30

Yes to normal and yes you need a sling.

Try to have a go with some different ones - I bought a wrap sling thinking it would be idea for DS3, having given my old one away, but just couldn't get on with it and ended up buying another Baby Bjorn so I could carry him around nearly all day, do everthing I needed to (can even go to the toilet with them there!) and get on with things.

Original poster

CheshireSplat · 02/03/2012 14:32

That's great, thanks, both of you. Very reassuring. A sling is a good idea, I'll give it a go. And yes, DP is around in the evenings and very helpful.

I made the mistake of meeting a couple of friends whose babies amused themselves in their prams. i know you shouldn't compare...

OP posts:

DreamingOfPeace · 02/03/2012 14:38

YYY exactly like my DD. they just want to be held- and why not?! except mine wasn't sleeping at night... The sling was invaluable, and if I positioned her bouncy chair so she could see me well in the shower and I sang to her it was ok if I was quick...

And of course it gradually clams down and thay accept- and want- to be down more

DreamingOfPeace · 02/03/2012 14:38

clams?! calms...

BoysAreLikeDogs · 02/03/2012 14:41

yes what they all said, sling will help

GREAT name btw

suburbandream · 02/03/2012 14:41

DS1 was exactly the same, I carried him in the sling everywhere - cooking, putting the washing out, even going to the loo like alana said . it won't be forever, honest!!

Original poster

CheshireSplat · 02/03/2012 14:45

Thanks everyone. It's a good excuse for a cuddle anyway!

OP posts:

Iggly · 02/03/2012 19:02

DD is 13 weeks and in thelast few weeks she's happier bring put down for a bit now so you'll get there!

Octaviapink · 03/03/2012 06:19

Your dd is very sensible and knows what's best for her! Totally normal. A sling can be a lifesaver...

llamallama · 03/03/2012 06:24

She just needs to be close to her mummy. Enjoy these precious weeks, you won't look back in months/years to come wishing you had cuddled your baby less! She is too little to "learn" to be on her own, she will just upset and you will get upset.

Babies need their mummies close. Some babies need them closer than others. She is communicating a need to you. If she had a different need, like feeding or changing, then you would see no reason not to attend to that need. Her need to be close to you is no different in her eyes.

Enjoy!

PessimisticMissPiggy · 03/03/2012 06:47

My dd was the same. I used a Moby sling all the time! I remember going to the loo in a shopping centre wearing her and thinking it was v odd. As she got bigger it was more difficult but now at 10 months I still have to do things one handed with dd balancing on one hip (including the loo sometimes!) If it makes her feel less anxious them I've just got to deal with it.

I think that wearing dd in a sling when she was younger has helped with her being more relaxed and sociable. She's currently going through a clingy mummy phase (currently pinning me to the bed) but that's just what she needs whilst teething.

Original poster

CheshireSplat · 06/03/2012 10:01

Thanks everyone, that's so helpful. I'm enjoying the cuddles, as advised! Also I've located my nearest sling library.

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Original poster

CheshireSplat · 28/05/2012 10:01

I thought I'd update this as I spent lots of time searching previous posts for advice so I hope this might comfort other people in the same position.

DD is now 20 weeks and it's just as the wise Mumsnetters said it would be. Suddenly at about 13 weeks I could put her down for about 20 minutes. Now she'll play on her own on her mat for up to an hour and my life is transformed. She also is a delight - at about 13 weeks she started grinning and hasn't stopped so the relaxed and sociable traits others have mentioned also apply here.

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