Smacking as part of play. Wwyd?

[LaTristesse]

DS is just 2, we don't smack him, although that is at my insistence. DH took some convincing to agree and still threatens to occasionally. DH and other family members (he's with MiL 2 days when i work) have been including smacking toys and each other as part of play, i.e. 'did Uncle X pull a face at you? Smack his bottom!' that kind of thing... Personally it doesn't sit well with me: I have already noticed DS doing things like smacking my hand if i do stuff he doesn't like, which was one of the reasons for me not wanting to smack him- I don't want him to think it's acceptable to lash out if something happens he doesn't like.
So do I put my foot down and tell others there's to be no smacking of any kind, playful or otherwise, or will DS (and I!), get our heads round it somehow, without any lasting ill-effect?

DD1 smacks my hand or leg if I am telling her off and we have never smacked her, or threatened it. The only "smack" we do is "penny a smack" when you tap a bare bottom on the way to the bath or something and they run off giggling? That sounds weird so I hope you know what I mean

My point is, because 2 year old's don't have the vocab usually to convey their feelings they lash out physically. Regardless of you not lashing out iyswim.

Thanks Billy (I do know what you mean!)

I understand that a child this small has limited means of expression but I'm worried about reinforcing the link between smacking and punishment, or that it's acceptable.

Anyone else have any thoughts on this?

NO - you stop all hitting as part of play and your DH and his family must stop it too. We Do Not Hit - end of story. You must put your foot down immediately - now is the time, otherwise he's going to go to school/nursery and start doing it, then you'll really have a problem. No smacking/hitting, not ever, not as part of any game.

Anecdotally a friend's DH used to teach his DS to 'bop' toys on the head as part of playing. Obviously he went to nursery and started thwacking other children on the head with things. It took them a while to put it together and ages to break the habit.