what age to put ds into nursery?

[loveroflife]

Hello there,

I'm just wondering is there a 'best' age to put ds into nursery. We go to a couple of storytime/soft play sessions a week, but have noticed he doesn't really like sharing that much.

I'm a SAHM, and was wondering whether 2 would be too early to put him into a pre-school for a couple of afternoons a week to enjoy time with other children?

He is 18months at the moment - I'm keen to hear others experiences of what they think is a good age for social interaction etc...

Thanks very much
xx

DD1 started preschool at 2 and 9 months (2 mornings a week) as did DD2.
However, DD2 did one full day at nursery from about 18 months. She loved the company and missed her sister after she started school.

I don't think there's a right answer, but I think even small children appreciate the company of their peers and in modern small families don't necessarily get much.

No, as long as he seems to enjoy it, 2 afternoons a week is ok. DD went 5 mornings a week from 2yo and then full time at 2.5 and loved it-often she doesn't want to leave! I think it depends on the child's personality more than just age.

Thanks very much for the advice.

As he is my first, I want to cherish every moment with him, but am so aware of development and confidence and don't want to 'hold him back'.

I know it sounds silly but we've done BLW and I didn't want that to be messed up as I did a little bit of research and found that most places didn't really welcome it so thought I'd hold off for a bit until he was happy with that.

My husband is away all day, so it is often just DS and I alone together at home and am now feeling he could benefit with some other interaction.

mine didnt start until they got their funded places at age 3. I didnt see any need for it before then (and of course you would have to pay for it too!)

Mine started at 10 months. Didn't have much choice really as my maternity leave was up and had to go back to work. I think with him starting so young it was a lot easier for him, he settled in quickly and now 2 years later he loves it. Lots of friends and it's really boosted his confidence.

I am a SAHM too with a DS who is 2.5....ive been toying with the same idea that you have for the last year but have settled for taking him to groups instead, he goes to three or four groups a week for the social interaction...he is now due to go to a nursery in september when he just turns three, one day a week to start going up to three mornings in janurary...i am finding it hard the thought of letting him go! i think it goes so fast, and they grow so quick and will soon be at school all day,if you are able to spend as much time with him as possible....

Don't think they "need" to go before 3 unless you are desperate for time to yourself.

Wouldn't worry about development and confidence that young. A lot of that is marketing speak for nurseries imo.

My DD started nursery at 13 months but had no choice as had to go back to work after maternity leave. DD absolutely loved being in nursery from day one and I have noticed that she has become very sociable in comparison to her baby friends who have not been to nursery/play groups. Her speech has also come along vastly but that may just be coincidence.

BTW, no 18 month old likes sharing, regardless of whether they are at home or in nursery so I wouldn't worry about sending him to nursery to try and sort that out.

If you are going out and mixing with other children that is fine. I would not have put my DD into nursery at 13 months if I was not going back to work but would probably have waited until 3 years for the pre-school bit.

It's lovely to read all your comments.

The nursery that I was considering putting him in is a lovely one and is the only one where we live to be awarded an excellent from Ofsted.

It's pricey though - £45 for an afternoon and the principle says that if he is to come he needs to do two days afternoon together to get the most from it. So, I'll be looking at £360 a month for 'social interaction'.

We go to the free soft play classes/library sessions at the moment, so we would have to budget very carefully to afford the afternoons.

I don't think I'll be able to find a job that would let me do two afternoons of three hours per week! I would also love to have another child at some point and was hoping for an age gap of 2/3 years, so that's another factor in considering when to return to work....

Re: the funded places, is every child entitled to those and are they means tested? I will go and do some research into that..

Thanks everyone

yes, everyone is entitles to a funded nursery place from the term after they turn 3 - it is not means tested. See here

If I were in your position, I would wait until you get a funded place. I don't think there is any need for children under 3 to go to nursery and that they get what they need at home before that.

Mine started 2 days at about 16 months, but only as I was working. If I had been at home they wouldn't have gone until 3, unless I had really needed the break.

My point is that I don't believe it's necessary for their development before 3, but not harmful if you need some time to yourself either.

I wouldn't do it "just" for social interaction. Our pre-school is ofsted outstanding but about £15 a session! Yours sounds very very expensive for just 2 sessions. If I was in your position I'd probably find some mummy-and-me type things to do for a lot less that would also give you regular social interaction (we go to a music group that costs £5 and did baby gym for a while that costs £17 a month - for the equivalent price to your nursery you could buy a lot of experiences.) We also go to a fab mums and toddler group - if you find a local one you can also get to know some mums in your area too.

I meant to say - at 18months it is normal for them not to like sharing!