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[fredericsmum]

My son is 22 mths and he refuses to sit in his highchair. He has two siblings who have never had this problem. If i just strap him in against his will he hurts himself trying to get out. Distraction has no impact whatsoever, whether its me dancing around or giving him toys. I havent tried brand new toys but that could get expensive. He will decide to get in if there is food on the tray but then he has about three mouthfuls and screams to get out. Ive tried letting him out and allowing him to wander around the kitchen while his siblings eat (and making sure he has snacks and things at other times) and hoping this thing will pass, but he just ups the anti and demands to be carried and keeps changing his demands (let me up, let me down, give me this) until i cant take it any more. Its driving me mad. As im sure you all know i need this time when the kids are in the highchairs to cook, unload the dishwasher and tidy, not to mention paying attention to my other children. Any ideas?

Golly I wouldn't bother trying to keep a 22 month old in a highchair! Both mine graduated to chairs they could climb in and out of themselves at about 16 months. He really doesn't need to use a highchair at this age - they start understanding about falling much earlier and don't need to be strapped in by now. He may well hate being confined (I don't blame him!), so if you give him the option of freedom it may paradoxically make sitting at the table to eat much more attractive to him. You could change him to a booster seat as a first step - then he can eat off the table not his highchair tray.

Thanks for answering my post. hes really 18 mths - my attempt to disguise my/his identity somewhat - and he cant sit in a chair becausehe is so full of beans hed be on the table in a second, or if not that bouncing on the chair and falling off. Id worry id have the same problem with a booster. But i need a solution so any further thoughts you have would be very welcome.

my DS is 27m and we havent used a highchair since about 20m. mine has a toddler's table and chair of his own (ikea) which he seems to love, the idea that it is his and no-one elses seems to help! He will sit and eat his dinner there, sometimes with TV on, very well and will also sit in a normal adult chair for dinner round a dining table these days which is good for eating out :) We also have a booster seat which ties on to any chair which we don't use often these days but was good when he was younger. I think we got it in tesco? Sometimes I will give him paper and crayons if I need him to sit still for longer at the table (i.e., if we have guests or something) or a favourite book.

our 22 month old gave up at about 16 months, she sits on one of those booster things

Umm, can I just gently point out that if you're trying to preserve anonymity then having a username that contains your son's name might not be the best choice?

I really would ditch the highchair. You say he'd be on the table: well, that gets the same response as all the other things he's not supposed to do; and if he falls off (fairly unlikely, actually) he won't hurt himself badly and he won't do it twice. Booster seats have straps in any case. He may just want to be at the table with his siblings and not be treated like a baby (which he's not!).