One year check - do they really do all that stuff?

[Sleepstarved]

Got letter from HV about one year check and it has a list of things they should be doing.
DD is not waving, clapping or pointing. Does say Dada but not Mama , doesn't give us toys when asked or 'find' toys when asked.
She has some gross motor delay (not crawling properly) but has been checked and not thought to be anything serious.
Am worried if this check will show she signs of delay in other areas now too .
Do all one year-olds point, clap, wave ect?

No, they don't.

Some do more, some do less, and others do exactly what the chart tells them to. Some don't do any of it because on the day they don't want to co-operate with the HV. DD at 1yo tended to give you a look if you asked her to do anything - still does now at 23mo.

Obviously, some children will have delays in areas of learning but you might find that they're advanced in other areas. Every child is different, please don't spend time worrying about it.

You don't have to have any of the HV checks either, they're all optional - DD's not been seen by a HV since she was 6mo (although if your DD has shown delay in the past, I can see why you'd consider going)

I got an appointment but not the list, ds3 can clap and has just started to crawl but that is all, Oh we think he might say gone, but sometimes it sounds better than others

I didn't even know they have a 12 month check, dd is 13 months - who arranges that, the Health visitor or the doctor? I think she had a 9 month check..?

It isnt an exact science but you should be more or less in the ball park. Have a look at developmental milestone checklists and think about how your child is doing. Is early days yet so don't panic but do think about it and ask for a referal to pead if you get concerned
At 18 months not copying and not following points/using points (really its about shared attention and sharing interest) is part of the CHAT screening for children at risk of autism.

She has just seen a paed for her motor skills and she said DD was alert, engaged and sociable.
DD does copy some words, thinks its really funny to copy us coughing ect.
If I point she looks to where I am pointing, not at my hand.
It was more the lack of hand specific stuff, the pointing, waving and clapping things. The paed didn't ask us if she was doing any of that stuff and I didn't know she was supposed to so didn't raise it.
Shanastar, the health visitor arranges it, but it can be done at any time from nine months to one year so sounds like your DD has already had it.

my grandson is 13 months and lives with us,he can clap and wave,but he cant point,we use to hold his hand and wave for him,when we have vistors going home,and one day he finally did it himself but with two hands..They all do different things at different times,i remember my son didnt have the pinser grip and the health visitor made a big thing about it,each time i saw her and it worried me,3 more children later,i realised,they do things when they are ready,i know it can be worrying,as you tend to note what other children can do at the same age. He only says dada and yells alot :)

They're just all so different, and IMO 12 months is probably too young to be worrying much about anything, as long as there are no developmental issues jumping out. DS1 didn't point, clap or wave at 1 (and didn't ahve any words), and was only just crawling. He seemed a bit slow (and I did worry - but we don't have a one year check here so there wasn't any HV input), but he suddenly took off and could do all of these things a few months later. He walked at 15 months, and his speech by 2 was really quite good - people used to comment on how well he spoke. He's now 3.6 and I have no concerns at all about his development. They do all follow slightly different developmental curves (DS2 could not be more different - clapped and waved at 7 months, crawled at 8 months, is now pointing at almost 10 months, and I really wonder if the difference is partly because DS1 as a first child had nobody to try to copy, and no real need to try to get to me or get my attention, because I was always just 'there' second guessing what he wanted all the time).