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So,the day just got worse.....

24 replies

Donbean · 24/01/2006 20:12

If any of you laugh at this...so help me i shall swing for the lot of you!
It all started with ds vomiting on DH yesterday morning. DH thought that he would HELP me by putting the vomit soaked PJs and big towelling dressing gown in a pile in front of the washer.
By the time i finished work, those items were dry and caked together and stinking to high heaven in the warm centrally heated kitchen....

Wait...it goes on.......

So, hand soaked them, fished out lumpy bits and put them into the wash.........hmmmm, had to be done.

Wait.....it goes on......

So this evening ds (2.5) decides that actually he would like to use the loo for a wee! Fantastic thinks i, fantastic...what a clever little boy!
I pealed off the nappy and ds stood up to the loo like a big boy, pushes me out of the door and closes the door behind him.
I sit behind the door calling encouragement.
He opens the bathroom door and bursts out proudly anouncing a wee in the loo....FANTASTIC!!
Pushes passed me into his bedroom.....comes back towards me with tears in his eyes......"THUD" i heard and there was a huge steaming turd on the landing.
"ive poohd in my bedroom he anounces as im picking the log up with a wad of loo roll.
Glancing into his room......runny pooh all over the carpet.
Dunked ds into the already run bath and mopped up while wretching at the stench of the pooh.

NO it doesnt end there......

Got into a gorgeous bubble bath with ds, began to wet my hair ready to wash it, when ds.......you guesed it.....VOMITED exsersist fashion all over me in the bath.......TWICE.
I was sat in a bubble bath, mouth agape with raisins stuck to my tits and second hand yoghurt floating around my floo.

Final insult was me shoving bits of food down the plug hole with my big toe whilst showering vomit off me and ds.

So, im off to bed in half an hour to sulk.

SO, How was your day????

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Yorkiegirl · 24/01/2006 20:13

Message withdrawn

hunkermunker · 24/01/2006 20:13

DB, am I really not allowed to laugh? Even in a sympathetic way?

Oh, I'm sorry, I can't help myself.

If it's any consolation, it's making my stitches hurt

Donbean · 24/01/2006 20:15

HAHA! of course you can laugh...even im laughing at it!
Bless him, cant wait to tell his girlfriend in later years.

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kalex · 24/01/2006 20:15

No really not laughing, really really not laughing, OK maybe a wee bit

charliecat · 24/01/2006 20:16

He hehe he. Tommorow cannot be any worse

vivie · 24/01/2006 20:19

I'm sorry I couldn't help it. Tomorrow's another day.......

Pip · 24/01/2006 20:23

Sorry, but that's a hilariously bad day. It was the raisins & secondhand yoghurt sentence that got me.

blueteddy · 24/01/2006 20:29

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gomez · 24/01/2006 20:30

Utterly hilarious - sorry .

I don't know how you manged to not hurl in the bath youself - yuckkkkky.

motherinferior · 24/01/2006 20:48

My morning 18 months ago may cheer you up, I hope.

Donbean · 24/01/2006 20:54

Indeed MI, i do feel better because animal shit is by far more gross than toddler shit...in ALL its forms.

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puddingandpie · 24/01/2006 20:55

What a day thought mine was bad but wee buns compared to yours ...but it did cheer me up especially raisins in the bath hilarious. No not laughing honest!!!??? tomorrow can surely only get better. ((hugs)

willow2 · 24/01/2006 20:56

So, when is the exorcism scheduled?

WigWamBam · 24/01/2006 20:57

I was ever so good and managed not to laugh right up until the bit about you sitting there with raisins stuck to your tits and second hand yoghurt floating around your floo ... at which point I'm really sorry but I fell off my chair laughing

What can I say except ... I hope tomorrow is better!

Donbean · 24/01/2006 20:57

Thanks all! Im not complaining honestly, its all part and parcel i know. It has made me chuckle and some friends laugh out loud today so i though i would share it with you all to give you a laugh....at my expense!

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Donbean · 24/01/2006 20:59

Its true! In the bath i carefully comb his hair over his horns and try to hide his pitch fork. I do struggle to conceal his tail tho!

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BudaBabe · 24/01/2006 21:00

Sorry but I did laugh - it was the raisins and youghurt that did me in too!!!

Thanks!!!

TwoIfBySea · 24/01/2006 21:15

Well Donbean I can only say I hope tomorrow is a lot better for you! Not laughing, promise (hehe!)

Bugsy2 · 24/01/2006 21:22

At least he didn't eat the steaming turd Donbean, which is what my dd frequently used to do - imagine puked up poo in the bath with you!!! The joys of motherhood & happy domesticity! Hope tomorrow is less excretia orientated.

TwoIfBySea · 24/01/2006 23:31

When our dog went through a poo-eating phase we were advised to feed him pineapple. Wonder if it would work with children!

Actually the thought is making me sick (of the poo-eating, not the pineapple.) See Donbean, there is always someone worse off!

Now lets see if I can kill this thread too!

Donbean · 25/01/2006 20:03

YIPEE!!! Today has been fab fab fab!!!
DS has done 2 wees in his potty and 2 wees in the toilet.....the first time EVER!!!
Im so proud of my bath vomiting, steaming turd dropping boy!

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puddingandpie · 25/01/2006 22:14

Donbean your posts are so funny well done to d/s.
I thought about your post raisin etc inbetween patients today and nearly laughed out loud. keep us posted. I think you have to send that post into a magazine and get letter of the week ie I'm boring and only get good-housekeeping some mum and baby one. Definately deserves a bunch of flowers.

Donbean · 26/01/2006 19:04

Have decided NEVER to share a bath with ds again.
Last night we were in our LURVLY delicious bubble bath, im pouring water on my head when ds anounces smuggly that "ive done a wee wee in the bath mummy".
Thats great says i with the last drops of water dripping onto my soaked hair......

Take this as a warning people...little people are NOT to be trusted in the bath. Learn from my mistakes.

All thats left now is a huge floating lion bar in the bath with us and thats every bodily fluid know to man in my bath with me.
HOHUM.

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Donbean · 26/01/2006 19:18

Well...except....you know...

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