Help! Previously chilled ds (5.5months) has started throwing a wobbly every time I leave the room...what do I do??

[fluffymummy]

Help! Ds is now 5.5months and has always been quite happy to play on his own for up to 10-15mins at a time on his mat or sitting up...which was great, meant I could grab a shower, do the housework etc. But suddenly he has started going sobbing the moment I walk out the room and is howling within a minute or two.
What do I do? I can't leave him (he's properly yelling!) and I don't want him to feel abandoned, but not being able to get on with things, even a bit, is driving me up the wall! He's now starting to get grouchy even when he can see me, if he's not actually on my lap...
How do I get him back to where we were??
Thanks!!

You wait a couple of months. He'll grow out of it again. He has just realised that you are a different person to him, and can therefore leave. So he is panicing when he can't see you. Or something like that.

You can play peekaboo a lot, that is supposed to help.

And lie him on the bathroom floor while you shower...

Sorry, that doesn't sound very sympathetic! Its hard work while it lasts but they all do it and they all grow out of it again.

ds (17m) did that too at around 6 months. It's quite unnerving isn't it. I did get to grips with hit by playing peekaboo with ever longer gaps . 'Unfortuntely' he can walk very well now, so sometimes I have a toddler permanently attached to my leg!

afraid it's the dreaded separation anxiety kicking in. it does pass.

aha...for some reason I thought the whole separation anxiety thing didn't kick in until they were older...d*mn!! so there are no fab short-cuts to getting through this phase...shame...

no shortcuts I'm afraid but some 'self-medication' does help... nice bottle of vino in the evening

yup, have the sauv blanc cooling in the fridge already

so is leaving ds to yell for a few minutes (when i know he's definitely ok, clean nappy, safe etc) ok, or will it make the whole thing worse?

I'm not too keen on going running in every time he starts yelling but equally I don't want to leave him with a complex about being left alone....[panic]

don't panic! If you know 100% that he's ok it won't harm him to let him yelp for a little bit

ds is older now of course but still doing the same, otherwise I or nanny would end up carrying him round all day long and he's way too heavy for that. He's now at a point where after 20secs if no reaction he just gets on with it and 'destroys' one of his toys for blissfull entertainment

thanks! I was hoping that if I left him for a few minutes at a time before going back in he'd eventually get the message that I haven't disappeared for ever. So far it hasn't worked, but, as you say, you can't carry them around with you all the time...
But I feel like such a bad mummy when he's all red in the face and yelling like the world has ended and I don't go running in....[guilt]

well that's his cunning plan.
Remember... blackmail is the first thing a child learns
and to manipulate
and to make you feel like an ogre
and and and

i used to find it easiest to take them out to see people/do things/go for walks. rather than trying to get on with stuff in the house while they cried.

messy house but we were both happier for it. and then one day when they are older you can clear up the house. my youngest is 21 months now and finally we are doing a bit more housework, now and then . 7 years of cobwebs are being dealt with.

have you ever tried putting the baby in bouncy chair in front of washing machine when it is on
I used to put all of my children in front of it so I could hoover and do quick tidy up
even sometimes when doing the dinner
found they liked the watching of washing going round
dont know why it worked but gave me a few minutes peace at the time to get things done

Funny thing is, if he wakes up (and isn't hungry, of course) he'll lie and play happily for an hour on his own. If I take him to my mum's when he's awake he'll scream and scream if I leave (and keep going for an hour), but if he wakes up there and I'm not there he's happy as larry...

that's normal too
both my kids are worse when I'm around
if nanny looks after them, not angles but defo better

Just wanted to say a proper thank you to everyone for your advice - I've been really worried that I was 'doing something wrong', so its very reassuring to know that this is all normal!! Cheers